Shittier Days

[Brantly B.]

Whenever people tell me they need to work just to keep moving, I try to suggest donating their time to charity. Nobody I've ever talked to about it has ACTUALLY gone and done anything besides talking, so I can't say whether or not it's a good suggestion.

[Mongrel]

Starr was doing that for a while after she couldn't work. Eventually had to give that up for the same reasons she had to give up working.

But those are related to her plethora of medical issues, so I don't think her situation necessarily applies more broadly.

[Thad]

Late to the thread because I usually avoid clicking on this thread, but...sympathy and best of luck, Joxam; I don't have much to add beyond what people have already said.

I don't think we've talked specifically about health insurance -- are you insured through work? If so, I can see how losing your health insurance could be a bigger obstacle to quitting than just losing your income, but since you haven't mentioned it I'm guessing it's probably not. Anyway, given what I know about your work I'm guessing you wouldn't do much worse getting something from healthcare.gov. But diabetes can get expensive, so don't fuck around; get a good health plan and make sure it covers everything you need.

If you're worried about figuring out what to do with yourself all day, look at it this way: getting healthy is your job, and you should tackle it with the same emphasis you've put into your work. If you don't get healthy, you're not going to be able to keep working anyway. Hit the gym when you've got to, rest when you've got to, eat when and what you've got to. And if that doesn't do enough to fill your hours, well, there's freelance work, part-time work, volunteer work, and so on. If just working on your hobbies doesn't do it for you and you feel like you need to do something for compensation, you can try and find a way to monetize them. (Currently I'm working on updating my portfolio site, and next I want to get back to trying to self-publish some stories. I don't know what you'd be into doing along those lines, but I bet you can find something.)

I don't have much else in the way of specifics; Grath seems like he knows his stuff. My wife's diabetic too so I could run some questions by her if you have any, but it sounds like yours is more advanced than hers; she doesn't need to take insulin, just Metformin.

[Mongrel]

IIRC, they've got insurance through the tribe, but I'm not 100% sure on that. I'm sure Jox or Mal can confirm.

And Thad's right about trying to monetize other things or even just make them more a structural part of your life with money removed from the equation. I'm trying to monetize my hobby right now because it's looking less likely I'll ever be able to go back to office-type work again. What that might mean for you, I don't know... I'm not saying turn your WoW guild into your life, but I'm sure you have other things you do or would like to do which are more rewarding and which would allow you to grow the same sort of pride as working does.

EDIT: I think in general, our generation is starting to see that old work-pride equation decouple, at least somewhat, but where that will go and what it means for most people is still up in the air. While that means offering guidance on what to do when not conventionally working is hard, it also leaves you more free to find something that makes you feel right.

[Joxam]

The fuck of it is I don't have any insurance. On the other hand I get free preventative care, dental, eyes and prescriptions through my tribe. This is why I was uninsured, I figured I could catch most things before I could get to needing hospital and when you make what I do (despite the fact that I almost have no bills (remember we own our home, cars etc all free and clear) 70 bucks a month for shit health coverage is still a tank of gas and a few nights meals, but that both A requires actually giving enough of a fuck to use their services and B being able to take the time off of work to actually do what I need to do. Like i said, this basically all boils down to thinking I'm young and bulletproof like most young males. When I told the doctor I hadn't seen a Doctor in maybe five years he said and I quote, "Well most men don't go until they're fifty, you're about 20 years early by our count" and then laughed.

Also I freely admit the only reason I have this job is loyalty to my aging boss. She basically asked me to stay there until she retired and I said I would, as her right hand basically. She knows it, I know it. She knows I hate the company, she knows I don't agree with the labor laws or company politics, etc. I only work there because she is going to retire in like two years and basically I figured I could stick it out.

About the 'staying busying' thing. That isn't even an issue at my job. I'm basically the box office manager now that projection is all digital which means I either sit in box office being bored or am doing computer work being bored.

[beatbandito]

She basically asked me to stay there until she retired ... She knows I hate the company, she knows I don't agree with the labor laws or company politics, etc.

That was a really dick move on her part.

[Mongrel]

Eh. I don't think we know this person well enough to judge.

But I absolutely retract any suggestion that you stay on. Leave that job be and tend to your health.

[Thad]

Coincidentally, I just happened to catch a story on NPR after writing my post titled Spreading The Word: Obamacare Is For Native Americans, Too. Might be relevant; it's something to consider, anyway.

I've got no idea what plans look like where you are. Mine is $280 a month for HMO, which as you might expect is a bit of a drain on my no-income. It may or may not actually be any better than the coverage you get through the tribe.

(Well, I shouldn't say no income; I've got a check coming for some freelance work that...is less than $280. But every little bit helps.)

I understand not wanting to make your boss's life harder. But if she's somebody who deserves the loyalty you've given her, then she should understand medical necessity.

...I don't think I've had a physical since 2007. I really should go get one.

Course, I don't currently have a primary care because I changed my insurance last year and accidentally dropped coverage for the one I'd been going to. ...you know, there are actually pretty good reasons to stay the hell away from private insurance.

[Joxam]

You guys also have to always consider that even without the job I'm pulling in what is basically a minimum wage job a month worth of income (1000 dollars a month) because of my tribe's casino profits. I'm never broke and quite frankly I make more take home a month from my tribe than I do from my real job. So I'm not going to be without to say the least. I'm glad for the concern though. I have actually been thinking about the pipe dream of monetizing a lot of hobbies (streaming, youtube game videos, short stories, screenplays, etc) for awhile but I just didn't have the time when I'm working full time like I have been. One of those 'I think I could be good at this but I don't have the time to build the fan base or a schedule that allows me to build a brand' issues.

[Grath]

You guys also have to always consider that even without the job I'm pulling in what is basically a minimum wage job a month worth of income (1000 dollars a month) because of my tribe's casino profits. I'm never broke and quite frankly I make more take home a month from my tribe than I do from my real job. So I'm not going to be without to say the least. I'm glad for the concern though. I have actually been thinking about the pipe dream of monetizing a lot of hobbies (streaming, youtube game videos, short stories, screenplays, etc) for awhile but I just didn't have the time when I'm working full time like I have been. One of those 'I think I could be good at this but I don't have the time to build the fan base or a schedule that allows me to build a brand' issues.

So basically, if I'm understanding this correctly:
- You don't want this job;
- You don't need this job;
- It's potentially bad for your long-term health to keep this job;
- and you have other options that you'd like to pursue.

As Shia LaBeouf would say, "Just do it. Don't let your dreams be dreams."

[Smiler]

As Shia LaBeouf would say, "Just do it. Don't let your dreams be dreams."

[Mothra]

Yeah there is no good reason, at all, to stay at that job.

[Joxam]

I resigned just now. It was a clean break. I wanted to do it in person but she was impatient about me not getting back to her after my Doctor's appointment and called me. I explained the situation she basically himmed and hawed a bit and tried to do the whole 'what's the difference between sitting around at work and at home' thing. When I answered a consistent schedule she agreed. After the phone called I e-mailed (felt like a dick for doing it in an e-mail but again SHE called ME) my resignation letter.

[Büge]

You'll be all right, Joxam. :)

[beatbandito]

Yeah it's fine. I know you feel bad for letting her down, but you shouldn't. You carried her weight for a long time and she'll manage.

[Mongrel]

When they told ya, "You're gonna carry that weight.", you did.

[Grath]

I resigned just now. It was a clean break. I wanted to do it in person but she was impatient about me not getting back to her after my Doctor's appointment and called me. I explained the situation she basically himmed and hawed a bit and tried to do the whole 'what's the difference between sitting around at work and at home' thing. When I answered a consistent schedule she agreed. After the phone called I e-mailed (felt like a spermapositor for doing it in an e-mail but again SHE called ME) my resignation letter.

Congratulations on your crappy-job-ectomy! I think I emailed my resignation in when I quit my call center job, but I'd already talked about it with the boss that I gave a shit about so he knew it was coming.

[hngkong]

Jox, diabetes is not a death sentence, but you need to take it seriously. Also, I really recommend you not eat even that many carbs. Your goal should be to have a 5.0 A1C, since that is a normal non-diabetic level. It's hard believe me, I'm diabetic as well and I fall off the wagon every so often, but you'll feel a billion times better with a 5.0 A1C than a 7.0 or whatever bullshit the ADA suggests. This website is a great read: http://diabetesupdate.blogspot.com/

[Mothra]

Yeah it's fine. I know you feel bad for letting her down, but you shouldn't. You carried her weight for a long time and she'll manage.

This~

[malikial]

All of his shit was only 'mildly' elevated. I dunno what that means exactly for everything. But I know that my sister told me he is literally on the SMALLEST amount of insulin she's ever seen and she had to care for 3 other of our relatives who had diabetes. I feel kinda bad for being relatively healthy, aside from a healthy dose of the can't sleeps and the short tempers. I'm perfectly fine.