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All Hail Ratboat

Posted: Thu Jan 23, 2014 10:39 pm
by Royal
First the Plymouth Herald publishes a piece about an abandoned ship full of cannibalistic rats about to crash into Devon. Then the Smithsonian had to go around ruin it by insisting we not assume a crazy old guy who looks for abandoned boats knows what he's talking about. Foo.

But to the Smithsonian I say, "Fuck you." Let us just have this one. Let us have this terrifying boat full of rats fighting and eating each other for the sake of establishing a rat hierarchy and seizing a boat to plunder and loot up the English shoreline. Let us have our uncertain fear that the boat could appear anywhere and devour any of us. Let us worship Ratboat. Let us love Ratboat. Let us feel the infinite scorn of Ratboat.

ALL HAIL RATBOAT!

ALL HAIL RATBOAT!

Re: All Hail Ratboat

Posted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 10:17 am
by beatbandito
Cannibalistic rats stuck together on a boat sounds like a problem that solves itself.

Re: All Hail Ratboat

Posted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 10:41 am
by Fran├žois
But then you end up with the one super-rat who absorbed all the other rats' power!

Re: All Hail Ratboat

Posted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 1:04 pm
by Royal
Presumably some have gained hyper-intelligence by eating other rat brains, and have created elaborate farming systems to sustain the entire boat 'til they make landfall.