Everything's Worse In Texas


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Mothra
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mothra » Mon May 04, 2015 10:28 pm

pfftthahahahaha

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Mongrel
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Mon May 04, 2015 11:32 pm

Something something live in hell and rent Texas.
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Tue May 05, 2015 1:49 am

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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Tue May 05, 2015 11:20 pm

Sorry, I don't have a source for this. It was simply presented as-is:

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Over the past few weeks, my office has been inundated with calls referring to the Jade Helm 15 military exercise scheduled to take place between July 15 and September 15, 2015. This military practice has some concerned that the U.S. Army is preparing for modern-day martial law.
Certainly, I can understand these concerns. When leaders within the current administration believe that major threats to the country include those who support the Constitution, are military veterans, or even ‘cling to guns or religion,’ patriotic Americans have reason to be concerned. We have seen people working in this administration use their government positions to persecute people with conservative beliefs in God, country, and notions such as honor and self-reliance. Because of the contempt and antipathy for the true patriots or even Christian saints persecuted for their Christian beliefs, it is no surprise that those who have experienced or noticed such persecution are legitimately suspicious.

Having served in the U.S. Army, I can understand why military officials have a goal to see if groups of Special Forces can move around a civilian population without being noticed and can handle various threat scenarios. In military science classes or in my years on active duty, I have participated in or observed military exercises; however, we never named an existing city or state as a “hostile.” We would use fictitious names before we would do such a thing.

Once I observed the map depicting ‘hostile,’ ‘permissive,’ and ‘uncertain’ states and locations, I was rather appalled that the hostile areas amazingly have a Republican majority, ‘cling to their guns and religion,’ and believe in the sanctity of the United States Constitution. When the federal government begins, even in practice, games or exercises, to consider any U.S. city or state in 'hostile' control and trying to retake it, the message becomes extremely calloused and suspicious.


Which resulted in this comment

the president's comin'

ring out the church bells. crank up the band!

hey, the president is a nig--

*church bell*

what'd he say?

the president is near!

no god blang dang blam it. the president is a nig--

*church bell*


It occurs to me to ask, how had we gone this long without anybody making that joke yet?
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Mongrel
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Tue May 05, 2015 11:34 pm

Oh, apparently the source for that quote (the first one, lol) is the the governor of Texas again.

SURPRISE.
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Sat Jul 04, 2015 11:19 pm



I CAN FORESEE NO PROBLEMS WITH THIS WHATSOEVER. CARRY ON, BROTHER TEXANS!

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Friday
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Friday » Sun Jul 05, 2015 1:28 pm

Texas just has to wave its smaller than Alaska's if Alaska was cut in half dick around every so often. Remember when ISIS said they would invade America through Texas and they came so fucking hard it actually stained the entire internet white for several weeks as they went over and over how badass they were and how huge their dick was and how fucked ISIS would be if they actually invaded and my god Texas oh my god your diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick

NO SERIOUSLY TEXAS YOUR DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK

I AM SO IMPRESSED WITH YOUR DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Sun Jul 05, 2015 1:33 pm

Well, it's more than I'm mocking the fact that those cannons appear to be entirely unbraced on a scaffolding that might as well be made of tinkertoys.
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Friday
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Friday » Sun Jul 05, 2015 1:35 pm

I wasn't replying to the cannons. The cannons are just stupid bullshit which is endemic to humanity, not Texas.
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Sun Jul 05, 2015 1:47 pm

but but but cannons go booooooooooooooooom
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Fri Jul 10, 2015 12:08 pm

Apparently not everything is more insane in Texas: Texas House panel approves full legalization of marijuana.

It's just a committee recommendation, but that's certainly an interesting direction to go in. Seems like Texas opting for full legalization would be a Big Deal.
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby TA » Tue Jul 21, 2015 3:06 pm

のほも is such a good word?? the concept is kind of hard to fully get across in translation, but basically it means a feeling of pure, deep, platonic affection, and i think thats beautiful

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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Tue Nov 03, 2015 1:17 pm

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Lyrai
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Lyrai » Tue Nov 03, 2015 4:25 pm

Why start learning now?

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François
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby François » Tue Nov 03, 2015 4:31 pm

Hopefully we're close to figuring out how far that legislature is willing to go for its worship of ignorance. Too far, certainly, but I'll just keep crossing my fingers that there's a bottom to this barrel.



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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Sat Jun 18, 2016 1:03 am

Büge wrote:Texas responds with the equivalent of "you're not my real dad"


Which is Texas' response to pretty much anything from the Federal government Yankee occupation.
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Re: Everything's more insane in Texas

Postby Mongrel » Wed Sep 07, 2016 1:48 pm

Okay, double warning on this since a) Gawker, and b) it's a year old. That said, I can't believe this never came up earlier: Texan killed by alligator seconds after yelling "Fuck that gator!" and jumping into the water

...BUT YOU CAN'T TELL HIM MUCH
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