Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

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Mothra
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby Mothra » Mon Jun 19, 2017 6:24 pm

Put em on ice, boys...

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nosimpleway
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Thu Jun 22, 2017 2:00 pm

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That's a cave. That can't be Favros. Is Favros a cave? Is "Favros" a bit of fantasy etymology where the hard K drifted to an F and the last part of the word got shuffled around and it used to just be called "Cavern"?

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No, Kavernos is a town that looks like a town.

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Lyssa: It's so much bigger than Senn!
Dren: It's not that much bigger, actually.
Lyssa: Oh, you just have to spoil all my fun, don't you.

Where does an MRA get his water? From a well, actually...

It's an RPG, you come to expect that the four houses and a dozen or so NPCs wandering around town function as an abstraction of the hundreds more homes and people who presumably exist off-camera. That does make it hard to tell "tiny village" from "bustling metropolis", though, except Favros has cobbled streets and a stone wall around the city.

It's mentioned later on by a couple of NPCs and books in the library that Favros isn't super-big, being a largely autonomous principality on the outskirts of a much larger kingdom. It's just bigger than the sleepy little village Lyssa grew up in.

Lyssa: Come on! I can't wait to go gather quests and new gear! And also click on every single box, barrel, and other suspicious object in town to get random food items and small change.
Morgan: Well, before we do that, let's report to Captain Stonelark. I need to report in before we get to work. Come on, I'll lead the way to his office.
Lyssa: Fine, but if I see any loot I'm breaking this cutscene to grab it.

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Lyssa doesn't spot any piles of treasure in the city streets, so Morgan leads us to the Templarate uninterrupted.

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But I'm given control back before we get to the office, so it's time to dick around for a while. The big thing of note is that the cutscene with Angaraxasak, High Demon Lord of the Burning Legion Demon Lords, wasn't just comic relief. Dude's hanging out in the jail in the basement, though we can't go see him just yet.

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It's the storeroom in a military installation and all there is to find is a Minor Ability Potion? Come on! Even the sparring dojo back in Senn had a quality replica of RAGNOST, THE WORLD-GORGER.

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But what if the Runaway Five need to barge in for a quick cutscene before we all pack up and head to Threed?

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Nathan Stonelark has both a name and a portrait. That's how you know he's more important to the game than Lyssa's mother.

Morgan: Sir, I encountered these two in the pass. They're warriors from Senn.
Nathan: Only these two?
Dren: Hello, sir. It's good to see you again.

Nathan takes a long pause before the lightbulb goes off.

Nathan: Why, if it isn't little Dren! You've certainly grown since I last saw you.
Dren: Kids do that, I suppose.
Nathan: And how is your father doing?
Dren:
Dren: He's doing fine. He sends his regards.
Nathan: Excellent. Excellent. Be sure to say hello the next time you see him. But I'm afraid we'll have to dispense with the pleasantries.

Pouring salt into Dren's emotional wounds was the pleasantries?

Nathan: The Templare are in dire need of reinforcements. Am I to believe that you two are all that were available from Senn Villlage?
Morgan: I'm afraid so, sir.
Lyssa: Don't worry, we're all you need!
Nathan: And who might you be?
Dren: This is Lyssa. Despite how she looks, she's actually a competent fighter.
Lyssa: Despite how I -- And how do I look?
Dren: Tiny body. Ridiculously huge ears.

You know. Standard elf mage build. It works though.

Nathan: A Half-Elf, I see. It's been a long time since I've seen any of the elvish race.
Lyssa: You met an elf before?! When? Where?
Nathan: Hmmm... I can't remember for sure, but something like sixteen or seventeen years ago? A beautiful blonde woman. She was carrying a bundle through the rain.
Dren: I see. Then this is probably not your first time meeting Lyssa.
Nathan: Is that so...

There's an AU out there where Lyssa was a foundling left at the Templar's doorstep and raised there instead of in Senn.

Nathan: Well, in any case. If you vouch for her Dren, then I will take your word she is capable. I make no secret I was hoping for more men, however. We are in need. Favros has many problems as of late.

I can assume, then, that you also sent someone to the kingdoms in the south to find other mercenaries, and we just haven't heard from them yet because they're not gameplay-relevant. Because if you're that desperate for help sending exactly one person to hire mercs from a little village like Senn is probably not the best idea you've ever had.

Nathan: With almost half my forces sent south

Oh.

Nathan: we are in sore need of warriors to aid the townsfolk of this good city.
Dren: If you don't mind me asking, sir. Why are so many of the Templar dispatched to the south?
Nathan: I'm afraid I can't tell you that. Suffice to say that we are handling it, for now. But as I said before, we need warriors able to fight, in order to assist the people here in town. Most of the rest of my Templar have duties guarding the walls. That watch must not fail. So, can I depend on you two to assist us?
Lyssa: We literally live for this stuff. Fighting monsters, rescuing lost animals, making bad puns. You know, the usual.
Nathan: Excellent. You're hired, then. Though I can't give you the entire 10,000 gold I sent with Miss Kastel, of course. But I think at least 1000 to start you off with will be fine. Miss Kastel, return the gold sack to me.
Morgan: Yes, sir.
Nathan: Miss Kastel?
Morgan: I can't find the gold!

Womp womp

Nathan: ...Excuse me?
Morgan: It's gone, sir!
Nathan: Are you sure?
Morgan: I checked twice!
Morgan: I... Wait a minute. On our way into town! This shady-looking guy brushed past me!
Nathan: A shady looking guy?
Morgan: Yeah! I bet he stole the money! It's gotta be him! Where else could it have gone!?
Nathan: I see. Then I have a first task for you and Lyssa, Dren. We've been having trouble with Bandits, recently.

Capital-B Bandits.

Nathan: Their main hideout is to the north, on a hill in the center of a forest. Miss Kastel, you will accompany Dren and Lyssa. Find the leader of these bandits. Recover the stolen gold. Return it to me.
Morgan: Yes, sir. We'll get back your money, don't worry.
Nathan: I trust that you will. Dismissed.
Morgan: Alright, you two, let's get going.
Morgan: Lyssa?
Dren: Lyssa? Are you okay? Lyssa?! Your eyes... they're... on fire?
Lyssa: I.
Lyssa: Am.
Lyssa: Fine.
Lyssa: Now.
Lyssa: Let.
Lyssa: Us.
Lyssa: Go.
Lyssa: Get.
Lyssa: Back.
Lyssa: The.
Lyssa: Money.
Lyssa: And.
Lyssa: Arrest.
Lyssa: The.
Lyssa: Thieves.
Lyssa: So.
Lyssa: That.
Lyssa: This.
Lyssa: Can.
Lyssa: Never.
Lyssa: Occur.
Lyssa: Again.
Dren: Lyssa, I don't think we can prevent all theft in the entire world just by--
Lyssa: ...
Dren: Uh, let's just get going. Lyssa, stop making that face! You're freaking me out!

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nosimpleway
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Thu Jun 22, 2017 2:33 pm

Before we go anywhere else, Morgan suggests we stop by her own house. So we do.

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Girl: Mommy!
Morgan: Izzy! I'm home!
Izzy: Mommy! Welcome home! Auntie Sam! Auntie Sam! Mommy's back!

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You can overlook it when you're talking to one person with a portrait at a time, but with both Izzy and Sam in this conversation it's a little strange that Morgan doesn't have her own portrait.

Morgan: Thanks, Sam. Everything okay here?
Sam: Yeah, we're both fine.
Morgan: Did you run out of sugar?
Sam: Yeah, and I went to the market and got more.
Morgan: Were you able to mend Isabella's dress?
Sam: Yes, of course. I'm not useless, you know.
Morgan: Did the priest come by? Because --
Sam: Yes, yes. Everything is FINE! You're such a worry wart.
Morgan: Well, it's only natural for me to --
Izzy: Mommy! Mommy!
Morgan: What is it, sweetheart?
Izzy: Um... um... Who are these people behind you?
Morgan: These are my new friends, honey. This is Lyssa, and y--

Suspicious!

Morgan: and this is Dren.
Lyssa: Hey kiddo!

When Lyssa speaks, she gets her portrait too. So Morgan is the only one in this conversation who's not important.

Izzy: ...
Lyssa: ...
Izzy:
Lyssa:
Lyssa: Rawr!
Izzy: Heheehehehehe!

Lyssa chases Izzy in circles until her next line of dialog comes up.

Dren: Somehow I'm not surprised they get along so well so fast.
Morgan: Haha, yeah. I guess Izzy and Lyssa are both kids at heart.
Dren: I'm a little surprised that you have a kid, though.
Morgan: Oh?

Dren sweatdrops.

Dren: Not in a bad way. I just wouldn't think a Templar would have one, I guess.
Morgan: Why not?
Dren: I... don't know. It's probably my dad talking.
Morgan: ...
Dren: How old is Isabella, anyway?
Morgan: She's eight. I had her when I was nineteen.
Dren: I see.

Morgan is twenty-seven, then. And Dren is two years older than Lyssa, who just had her seventeenth birthday, so Dren is nineteen himself. Which means that whatever was going to come after that "this is y--" earlier, it wasn't gonna be "--our brother", unless Morgan was popping out children with irascible blacksmiths at age eight. So there's some relationship between Morgan and Dren, but mother-son isn't terribly plausible.

Dren: And... Sam, was it?
Sam: Samantha. Hi. I'm Morgan's older sister.
Dren: It's nice to meet you. I'm Dren.

Just "older", without a specific age given. So maybe Dren and Izzy are cousins, idk.

Sam: A pleasure. So... I take it you two are part of the mercs Morgan went to Senn to hire?
Dren: Actually, we're --
Lyssa: We're not mercs! We're wandering heroes!
Dren: We may be mercs. It's a fine line.

Beats "murderhoboes".

Dren: Anyway, I was gonna say. We're not "part" of anything. We're it.
Sam: You're the only two Morgan could get?
Dren: I'm afraid so. Senn doesn't have much to offer in the way of warriors. But don't worry. We're both pretty confident.
Lyssa: I block your Hyper Laser Sword with my Ultra Dense Sound Shield!
Izzy: Nut uh! You can't block a Hyper Laser Sword!
Lyssa: Can too! The Ultra Dense Sound Shield can block anything.
Izzy: That's cheating! Nothing can block Laser Blade attack!
Lyssa: The Ultra Dense Sound Shield doesn't block things per se, it actually absorbs the energy of the attack and channels it into me, so I can dodge it.
Dren: Okay, so one of us is pretty competent.
Dren: Hey there, Isabella. I'm Dren.
Izzy: You have braids in your hair! That's like a girl!
Morgan: Hey, guys can braid their hair if they want to, Izzy.
Dren: You like my braid?

And here Dren gets his portrait for the first time in this conversation. Lyssa, on the other hand, has been without hers since "Rawr!" By accident or design, portraiture is pretty inconsistent.

Izzy: Um... I guess?
Dren: If you want, I'll show you how to do it for yourself, sometime.
Izzy: Alright! Thanks!
Dren: Also, the counter to Ultra Dense Sound Shield is "Super Shattering Sonic Wave".
Lyssa: Traitor!
Izzy: Ah ha! Now you're in for it! Super Cratering Sonic Wave!
Dren: Super 'Shattering'.
Izzy: That's what I said! Hi~~~~~~~~~YA!!!

Izzy's Super Cratering Shattering Sonic Wave gets a spellstarter around her, and fills the house with ripples of super shattering sonic energy.

Lyssa: Arrrggghhh! How... have I... been so defeated...
Izzy: Hehehehe! You're silly! I like you! Hey, mom! Can Lyssa and Dren stay for dinner?
Morgan: I'm sorry, no. We have a lot of work to do.
Izzy: Beating up bad guys!?
Lyssa: You bet! We're gonna punch the bad guys so hard, they'll wish they'd never been born!
Izzy: Yaaay! When I grow up, I'm gonna be just like you, Lyssie!
Dren: Please, no.
Izzy: Oh! I almost forgot! I made this for you, Mommy!
Morgan: Thanks, sweetie. You're the best little girl in the whole world.

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Oh my god this is the cutest thing to ever happen in a video game. I don't care if this item has no plot relevance at any point in the future, I love it even if it's as useful as Terra's pendant in FF6.

Anyway, that's it for Morgan's house. You can check Izzy's bookshelf for lots of Tiny Tiny Princess merchandise, and check Morgan's drawers to reveal that she does have a magic bikini that gives fantastic stat boosts, but that she's too low-level to wear it yet. But that's enough words for one update, isn't it?

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Next time, we wander around town for even MORE WORDS. It's an RPG Maker game, it's not exactly going to stand up as a pinnacle of game design based on the combat engine or game mechanics. It's got to have a great script, even if it's a pain to transcribe damn near the entire thing for a Let's Play. For example: I do like that, as a little touch, any of the guards you talk to eventually realize Morgan is with you and say hi to her directly.

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jun 24, 2017 10:06 pm

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For the most part, Morgan will keep us from getting too involved with any other jobs before we go take on the bandits that stole her wallet. So what we can do in Favros is kind of limited. But there are still things to do and see...

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Lyssa: Huh? Who ya calling fuzzy?!
Charles: Whad'ya mean you're not the Fuzz?! You guys are Templar for sure!
Morgan: Hey, Charles. Hey Edwin, Suzy, Bryce, Hannah.
Charles: Oh, hey Morgan. Sorry, I thought you was the coppers.
Morgan: Well, I mean. Technically I am.
Charles: Yeah, but you're cool. Not like that stiff necked Captain.
Morgan: You know, Nathan does a lot for you kids. You should be grateful.
Charles: Yeah, yeah. Hey, can Izzy come play?
Morgan: Yeah, sure, if she wants to.
Charles: Oh, man, she won't play with us anymore.
Morgan: Why not?
Charles: It's cuz' ever since we decided to be a bunch of Professional Thiefs, she said we were a bunch of dirty bandit bad guys and she won't be asso -- aser -- associ -- spending her time with us.
Morgan: Thiefs? You mean thieves.
Charles: Nah, we tried that, but some other town already had a Thieves Guild. So we're a Thiefs Guild.
Lyssa: Cool! Who do you rob?
Charles: Well, we steal from mostly the bad guys, but pickin's are slim recently so we've... expanded.
Morgan: You guys better not be causing any trouble for the town.
Charles: Oh, no ma'am. Nobody has caught us.
Morgan: That's not what I meant.
Charles: Say, are you guys friends of Morgan? You wanna join our guild?

I mean... joining a Thieves Guild isn't really much of the sort of thing a hero would do, right? Only this isn't a Thieves Guild, it's very clearly a Thiefs Guild. And Lyssa has no qualms about barging into someone's house and taking any apples or minor potions they might have lying around, so if anything we'd be bringing the average thiefiness per capita of the group up if we joined. So sure, why not.

Charles: Awesome!
Morgan: I suppose as long as we're not breaking any laws.
Charles: No promises. Anyway, for your first task, we need you to get my Rouge Pouch back. I dropped it in Favros Pass on the way to Senn a week ago, and I need it.

I think I know exactly where to find it.

Hannah: You mean your 'Rogue' Pouch.
Charles: Yeah, that's what I said. My Rogue Pouch.
Hannah: What's in this pouch, anyway?
Charles: Oh, you know. Rouge stuff.
Hannah: Rogue.
Charles: Right. Anyway, just go get it, and we'll talk more. Remember, it's in the pass to Senn. Bring it back to me. (And don't show it to the other guys, okay?)
Lyssa: (Pssst. You got it.)
Charles: (Thanks.)

So... I guess we're officially Thiefs now, or we will be once we go get a Rogue Rouge Pouch from back in the pass. According to Suzy, being a Thiefs mostly means nicking slime mold and throwing it at Edwin, so it seems to be pretty harmless fun.

The wall of the guild has the rules posted. They are as follows:

1. No stealing from anyone in the guild.
2. Charles is the leader. Because I'm oldest, Bryce.
3. (Charlie, put that I'm in charge of maps!) (Fine, calm down!) Hannah is in charge of maps.
4. Edwin shall never be called "Ed", "Eddie", or "Edward", because that's what his stupid older sister who doesn't care about anything but dumb boys calls him.
5. Suzy is not to be fed after midnight.
6. If Suzy is fed after midnight, protocol Seraphim-Alpha is to be enacted immediately.
7. In the event that protocol Seraphim-Alpha fails, all personnel are to engage hostiles (WITH THE EXCEPTION OF SUZY-PRIME) with maximum prejudice.
8. At 0035 hours, if contact is not made with Site FavrosGuild1, the on-site nuclear warhead is to be detonated.

So... uh, leave the maps to Hannah and don't steal from the guild itself. Got it.

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Although, speaking of maps...

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This guy sells you treasure maps. Or one, at least. 500 GP is pricey and I don't know what I'm getting out of it, but I'll figure it out once I reach wherever this location is and check under the rock.

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The grave is not locked, but the passage beneath it is, so there's no getting anywhere from here.

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Dren: You used to play, Morgan?
Morgan: Back when I lived with the church, yeah.
Nun: She was the best in the business! It was a sore blow to us here when Morgan decided to become a Templar.
Morgan: I can do more good as a Templar than by playing music.
Nun: Oh, I wasn't criticizing! Just saying your playing was beautiful.
Dren: I'd like to hear you play, sometime.
Morgan: ...I haven't played in years. I don't think I remember how.
Dren: My mother used to play the piano, before she got sick.
Morgan: ...Is that so?
Dren: I can still remember the way her hands would fly over the keys, and the amazing sounds she could coax out of that box. In my dreams, I sometimes can still hear her play.
Morgan: ...
Dren: ...Sorry. Just old memories.
Morgan: It's fine.
Morgan: ...
Morgan: Maybe someday I'll play for you.
Dren: That'd be nice.

Again, the game heavily hints that Morgan is Dren's mother, which still doesn't make any sense. Dren talks like he can remember when his mother was alive and was old enough to remember her dying -- although I suppose nobody has ever come out and directly said "DREN'S MOM IS DEAD". Drexl described her as "gone" and Dren just said she was "sick", so I guess that's all implication too. But the timeline just doesn't make sense, unless Morgan is older than she says she is, or Dren is much, much younger.

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The waitress's dialog choice has the third line marked as a separate option, though it's a continuation of the second line. Probably just limitations of RPG Maker. I order the Rainbow Trout to be delivered, and when she asks if there's anything else, I get a steak too. Grades A, B, C, D, and E are sold out, though. I have to settle for Fsteak.

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Don't be ridiculous, kiddo. Monsters aren't real. Er... except for the ones outside town. Anyway, the closet is actually locked so I can't just poke my head in and check for the kid. But she reports that the monster said to bring it "25 meals", which I am assuming is the word "medal" misheard through a closet door.

Let's see, what else is there in town... There are 21 medals to be found in the Favros area. I got nine out of ten in Senn, and I'm assuming Keretos has the last one. I'll be a bit before I get back to that, though.
Other townsfolk talk about the attack on the town of Axlek by Porcs 50 years ago, that left the entire town a ruin that hasn't been rebuilt to this day. We can assume it's monster-infested.
Others still fill us in on the political situation between Favros and Devahl, to the south. Devahl is the ruling kingdom but mostly leaves Favros alone. But all the Templar are deployed to the south, for reasons Nathan is tight-lipped about. Suspicious indeed. You can get there via Vel Pass, where the Tower of Magi is. The Tower of Magi is about what it sounds like.
The village of Kye is to the east somewhere, although it's pretty small and the fish are slimy and smell weird. There are jobs to be had and stuff to buy that the market at Favros doesn't have, though.


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Speaking of the Market, there are nearly a dozen different stalls and vendors here. I pick up some new healing magic for Lyssa and Morgan, including a focused single-target heal and a partywide weaker refresh. I'll upgrade equipment later, jumping straight to the top tier stuff available as I can afford it, like before.

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jun 24, 2017 10:50 pm

So. The other landmark in Favros, aside from the Templarate, the Market, and the city streets, is the library. The library is large. The library is just goshdarned full of text. And if I try to transcribe all of it we'll all be here all day. So I'll summarize:

  • Most attacks use either Attack or Magic Attack. Some use both, like Morgan's Flame Slash.
  • Attacks will hit with the elemental property of the weapon used, except for skills that have their own element to override those. Like Morgan's Flame Slash.
  • How Evade, Critical Hit, and Luck percentages work.
  • You can boost a stat twice with a skill like Parry. It's +25% each time.
  • "Pay attention to your TP", basically. Using HP-restoring items in a fight doesn't grant the usual +5 TP, though other items do. But I figured that out pretty well in the fights with the Gobboway Five, She's a Man-Eater, and Keretos.
  • Even if the boss monster is immune to status effects, its adds probably aren't.
  • How status effects work. Most drain HP as a damage-over-time, or force you to skip a turn. Blind, Silence, and Petrify work as you'd expect, Confusion is the same hit-your-allies bullshit it always is.
  • Taunt draws attacks but doesn't prevent AoE from wasting the rest of the party.
  • Guarding boosts Attack and Magic Attack by 120% for the turn after you do it.
  • Weakness to an element is a 20% damage boost, guard against an element is a 20% reduction. Some monsters are particularly weak or strong, for 50% instead.
  • Flying enemies are weak to wind.
  • Aquatic enemies are weak to lightning. So the Tiny Enemy Crab does have a weak spot to strike for massive damage!
  • Plants are weak to ice but resist water.
  • Humans are weak to shadow, usually. Porcs, Gobbos, and other humanoids don't count. Trolls are weak to fire instead.
  • The Sword of the Hero was broken into seven pieces. Even if you found them, no smith alive is capable of reforging the blade. (OH NO IF ONLY WE HAD A FRIEND WHO IS A BLACKSMITH PC OR SOMETHING)
  • Senn Valley was created when the Dragon Kyrinus fell to the ground, having been killed by Marul the Slayer. So I guess the grave we found was that guy, not Lyssa's dad.
  • Keretos the Black Wind is out there, and he's a dick.
  • Fae and humans used to live together, once humanity came around. Eventually they fought and were separated. Some fey think that was good, they should do that again.
  • Elves are half-human and half-Fae (so Lyssa, a half-elf, is a quarter-fey). They are the bridge between the world of the Fae and the world of men. The elves are gone, and so the Fae are... well, not in the world anymore, but still out there in their own dimension or whatever.
  • Magimouse are capable of writing books, sort of. They note that they themselves are week to cheez.
  • The Fae are separated into sects of Sun and Moon, with a few outliers like the Blackguards or those aligned with the Earth. The followers of Void are opposed to them all.
  • There's a whole story about the princess born to the Sun and the Moon, and the princess went missing for ten years and the Sun and Moon stopped doing their jobs to look. When Moon found her daughter, she, her daughter, was sitting on a throne of skulls. So that's probably bad.

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Bat: And I can SEE?
Bat: And people use more than 10% of their brains?!
Bat: And Bigfoot isn't real?!
Bat: And hitting someone on the head from behind doesn't just automatically knock them out?
Bat: And Lyssa's ears actually ARE the largest objects known to man in the entire wo--

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Here's the thing about Eyes of Ganon: they're everywhere.

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The entire textbox fills and disappears in a split-second. Next to it is Speed Reading for Beginners, which f i l l s a t a c r a w l .

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jun 24, 2017 10:56 pm

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Boy, there's a lot to do in Favros! But we're done, until we bring those dastardly bandits to justice and Morgan lets us go places again. First stop: Back to the pass to pick up Charles's Rouge Pouch.

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I dunno if we want to eat that, it's been sitting in a wooden box for god knows how long.

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The hills and vales of Favros are filled with Bandits, Slimest, Lil' Imps, and Boos. So, uh. If there's more than one enemy of a given kind in a fight, the game labels it with a letter. What I'm getting at is that the guy on the right there is named "Boo B".

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Hey, this spot looks familiar...

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The reward is 800 GP -- so a 300 profit -- a Heal potion, and a Magic Defense Seed.

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I pretty thoroughly explore the valley, but I don't engage any of the wandering monsters. I'm having a tough enough time with random encounters, still.

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FRIIIIIDAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby Friday » Thu Jun 29, 2017 4:04 am

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Fri Jun 30, 2017 10:37 am

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Morgan: This has gotta be the hill that the Captain was talking about.
Dren: Alright. Let's get that money back from the bandits.
Lyssa: ...
Dren: Stop making that face!

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There's a little stretch of woods with some shadow effects between the trees.

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Warning: This will be a pretty long dungeon, since there's an exit chute here.

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Fights are what you'd expect: lots of bandits! And given that they pop up two or three at a time in random encounters throughout a pretty long dungeon, there are more bandits here than there are citizens living in Favros itself. All the bandits are pretty quick (the cutpurse doubly so) and hit kind of hard (the knuckler doubly so). Bandit-Aid casts healing magic, of course it does, why wouldn't it?

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Bandit 2: I'm not!
Bandit: Yes you were! I just saw you! I swear, you're like a child.
Bandit 2: I wassssn't!
Bandit: That's the trapped one anyway, idiot!
Bandit 2: Dude, there's like, people behind you!
Bandit: I'm not falling for that!
Bandit 2: Seriously! Dude! Turn around!
Bandit: Okay, fine. If there are really people behind me, what do they look like?
Bandit 2: Well, uhm. One of them is sort of dirty blonde. He looks like a dweeb. Ya know, a real wet blanket type. Probably is always killing the mood.
Bandit 2: Then there's this cute blonde. I think she might be a Templar. Yeah, she's got their symbol on her armor. She's really cute, though! I'd give up my life of crime for her in a second. You know, settle down, raise a few rugrats.

Yikes, is this a Tempar or a Sandwich Artist? Hmm.

Bandit 2: And the third, well, she's got just like the most gigantic ears.
Lyssa: OH MY GOD.
Bandit: How long have you guys been there?!
Bandit 2: Pretty much since you told them this was the trapped switch.
Bandit: Well, whoever you are, ignore that, okay? I'm a bandit, we lie all the time. Always lying up in here, you know. Just all the time. Basically, everything I say is a lie.
Bandit 2: Well, except that.
Bandit: Right, except that.
Bandit 2: And that.
Bandit: Right.
Bandit 2: And that.
Bandit: Uh... yes.
Bandit 2: That too was not a lie.
Bandit: Or... was it?
Bandit 2: Yeah, or was it?
Bandit: In fact, I may have not ever never not ever never ever not not not not ever never not lied about not lying about lying about not lying.
Bandit 2: Yeah, and -- wait, what?
Bandit: I have never not lied about not lying about lying. Never.
Bandit 2: You've lost me.
Bandit: It's simple. You're on an island. On this island, there are two types of people.
Bandit 2: Go on.
Bandit: The first kind always tells the truth, and the second kind always lies. We'll call them Chumps and Bandits.
Bandit 2: oooooooh!~
Bandit: The problem is, Chumps and Bandits look exactly the same!
Bandit 2: Uh oh!
Bandit: Now, you come to a fork in the road. Two people are standing there. The one on the left says "The man standing next to me is a Bandit." and the other says "The man standing next to me is a Chump." So which is it? Who's the Bandit and who's the Chump?

The options here are "The man on the left is the Bandit"
"The man on the right is the Bandit"
"That doesn't make logical sense"
and the very
very
tempting
"(Kill the bandits)"

I take "That doesn't make logical sense".


Bandit: Eh?
Lyssa: See, you said the man on the left said the other one is a Bandit, and the right said the left is a Chump. But if the one on the left is telling the truth, that means the one on the right IS a Bandit, but he said the other guy was a Chump, which would be true. But it CAN'T be true, because he's a Bandit. So that doesn't work.
Lyssa: And if he's lying about him, then the other guy is a Chump, but the other guy said the first guy was a Chump, which isn't true EITHER. So it doesn't work either way.
Bandit: Crap, you're right. I messed it up. Alright, um. What if instead of just Bandits and Chumps, there were also INSANE people on the island, and--
Dren: OH MY GOD CAN WE JUST FIGHT ALREADY

man, what a wet blanket.

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The fight took less time than that conversation.

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But despite how long it's been since we got the hint, don't forget that the switch in the dresser is trapped. Look for another one.

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Your reward is another metahumor reference. I ain't gonna let it get to me, though. I give these to Dren since they're better than the sword he's carrying, even though that means he can't use Double Cut anymore, on account of that being a sword-exclusive skill.

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Fri Jun 30, 2017 11:21 am

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Bandits: Hey! It's the fuzz! Get 'em, boys!

A fight with more bandits follows. My reward is the food they were preparing, which is three whole hams. Guess they were all really hungry.

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(You gently lift the bundle from his grasp.)
(Found... Cheese?)
Bandit: Mumble... mumble... My... precious treasure...
Cheese Loving Bandit: My cheese! You thief! Give it back!

The options here are "(Return his cheese)" and "Neener neener got your cheese!" I'm pretty worn down by random encounters by this point, so I just give it back to him. He immediately goes back to sleep, and...

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Stepping on this panel makes a loud creak sound effect that is completely lost in a screenshot LP, but it doesn't wake the bandits sleeping nearby, so that's why Dren is saying that.
Lyssa: (Whew... close one.)
Morgan: (shhhh.)
Dren: (Let's go. Quietly now.)

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And one step later there's the unmistakable sound of a cellphone ringing.
Dren: Oh my god Lyssa! Turn off your phone!
Lyssa: Sorry! Sorry! I'll set it to silent.
Dren: And stop texting all the time!
Lyssa: lol kk idk rofl :P

So anyway there's a fight with three more bandits and the chest has 184 GP in it.

And finally...

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I hate this guy, mostly because I take a screenshot every time his text stops, and his text stops before and after every "hic!"
So this is actually the eighth screen capture I took of this one text box.


Red-haired bandit: You did what?
Bandit: Hic! I stole the money - hic! From this Templar woman, and she - hic! had no idea! Hic!
Blue-haired bandit: A Templar woman, bro? Ha! Good job.
Bandit: Thanks, - hic! Boss!
Bandit 2: And thanks to all that money, we were able to buy all this!
Red-haired bandit: Hmmph. I still say we should have spent it on upgrading our gear.
Blue-haired bandit: Spike, bro, you worry too much. Besides, we can always steal from the Templar when they come looking for their money, bro.
Spike: Who else did you say was with the Templar chick?
Bandit: Hic! Er, uh, this guy - hic! This guy with - hic! braids in his hair.
Bandit: And, this girl with - hic! with these like, really long ears! Haha, ain't that a - hic! trip?!
Spike: Huh? What'd you say?!
Bandit: Uhhh... hic! Long ears? Little girl?
Spike: Slade, do you think...?
Slade: What? There's no way, bro. She's all the way back in Senn, right?
Lyssa: Hey, guys. Miss really long ears here.

All the bandits "!" like they just spotted Solid Snake and turn to face the party.

Lyssa: What's up, guys?
Bandit: That's them! hic! That's the ones - hic! I stole all the money from!
Morgan: Yep. You're all under arrest. On charges of robbery, pickpocketing, banditry, and just in general bein' real ugly.
Spike: I can't believe that little freak is here! And Dren, too!
Slade: Man, bro, if it isn't little Lyssa long ears!
Dren: Huh. I thought I recognized you two. You're Billy and Willy Nafters. You're calling yourselves "Spike" and "Slade"? Nice. If you're thirteen.
Bandit 2: Huh? Billy? Willy? What's this guy talking about, boss?
"Spike": Shut up. What are you doing here, Dren? You lost?
"Slade": Yeah, bro. You lost? Cause you came to the wrong place.
Dren: Please. You want me to teach you little brats another lesson? I'm not even remotely surprised you fell in with a lot like this.

I assumed they'd been eaten by slimes or something, so they're doing much better than I'd expected.

Dren: Morgan, I doubt these two are going to come quietly.
Morgan: Yeah, I was sort of getting that impression. I don't mind taking them by force if we have to.
"Spike": Ha! That's a laugh. Take us by force? You and what army?
"Slade": Yeah, all I see with you is widdle Wyssa wong ears. What're you gonna do, cry at us? Hope maybe we'll feel sorry enough for you to let you go?
"Spike": Yeah, come on, Lyssa. Show us those tears, you freak.
"Slade": Yeah, come on, Wyssa! You were always good for a laugh. Why don't you make us laugh like you used to, ya father killer freak?
Dren: Lyssa... you okay?
Lyssa: ...
"Spike": Ha! She's gonna cry! Look at her!
"Slade": Come on, come on! Cry, you big crybaby! Maybe we'll go easy on you.
Lyssa: ...
Dren: Lyssa?
Lyssa: Ha! Ha ha ha! Hahahahahahahah!
Lyssa: Oh. My. God. You two think you can bully me into crying like when I was a kid? That's adorable! You two are pathetic! I actually can't believe it!
Billy: Shut your mouth, you freak!
Willy: Yeah! Shut up, you loser!
Lyssa: I'm bored of listening to you two. Can we just fight already? You guys are just too much for me.
Billy: We're gonna wipe that grin off your stupid face, half-freak!
Willy: Yeah! Get ready to lose, loser!
Billy: Guys! Get em! No mercy!

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Wow. I, uh, really should invest in some of those damage + status effect spells for fights like this. Shadow damage -- which humans are usually weak to -- plus a chance to inflict blind on some heavy-hitting physical attackers would be favorite right about now.

Except for particularly big nasty monsters that I'm not high enough level to properly fight -- Tiny Enemy Crab, She's a Man-Eater, and Keretos come to mind -- the biggest threat in the game is action economy. When the monsters are getting five turns to my three, and some of those turns are spent on buffs, healing, or inflicting stun or sleep on my three actions, the fight can be a real drag. Throw in TP management -- something the enemy doesn't have to worry about -- and things are particularly tough. I had to take a break and Guard once in a while just to keep my TP at manageable levels (though the extra 20% on attack next turn was nice too).


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The one advantage is that the enemy doesn't act with strategy. There's not even Magus Sisters level of tactics on display, each bandit here just pulls from its own moveset at random. If they piled the damage onto one target at a time, I'd have not a prayer. But I can focus fire and take down each add one at a time, making the fight a little easier each time I manage to take one out.
...Until only Billy and Willy are left. They're strong, but now I can have one person heal back the damage they inflict and two people on the offensive. So by this point it's all over but the cryin'.


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And it ain't Lyssa who's doing it.

Lyssa: ...Yeah, I'm fine.
Dren: What they said didn't bother you at all?
Lyssa: ...Well, a little, maybe. But I'm not the little girl I was back then anymore.
Dren: ... I guess not.
Lyssa: Right! Because... I'm a wandering hero! I beat the bad guys! I save the Dragon! I slay the Princess!
Dren: I think you've got that mixed up.
Morgan: Maybe it's a good Dragon being held against his will by an evil Princess.
Lyssa: That's right! Justice does not discriminate!

I fully expect this to be the plot of a sidequest at some point in the future.

Morgan: But justice does have to get these guys back to town so they can be locked up, somehow.
Lyssa: Why don't we just put them in our inventory? That way we don't have to carry them.
Morgan: Good idea.
Dren: I hate that we exist in a world where what you just said makes sense.

Image

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Fri Jun 30, 2017 11:50 am

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Lyssa: ... That's it?! They spent 9000 gold on beer and food?

Yeah, they probably should have upgraded their equipment.

Lyssa: I'll never forgive them! Ever!
Morgan: At least we got some of it back. Come on, let's get out of here. We need to report back to the Captain.

That hole in the back wall leads to the chute I saw before for a quick exit. But I've got one more thing to try before I leave...

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Yep. There's a wandering monster in the bandit camp.

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I'd be angry but I've used this exact naming scheme for a bunch of rogues in a D&D game.

Anyway, that thing I said about the action economy being more threatening than the monsters themselves? These guys get two fewer actions each turn, but they're stronger than any of the adds in the Billy & Willy fight. Hell, they're nearly as tough as Billy & Willy themselves.

Not knowing what any of them could do, I think I focused on Barrel first. Whichever one had the axe. But Stocke, it turns out, can cast Healing Breeze and patch everyone up! So if you're playing this yourself, hit him first instead.

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The reward is Locke's Blade, better than the Knuckler Knuckles by a fair margin and allowing Dren to Double Cut again, and Lyssa and Dren hitting level 11.

If there's anything else to do at the bandit camp, I missed it, because I left for Favros at this point.

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Guard: Oh? And who might these two be?
Morgan: This is Billy and Willy Nafters. They were leading the bandits up north. We've placed them under arrest on formal charges.

Turns out "in general just bein' real ugly" is illegal in Favros.

Guard: Billy and Willy? I heard the leaders were named, uh, "Spike" and "Sludge".

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Guard: No, no. Your text box clearly shows "Sludge".
Sludge: I won't stand for this!
Morgan: Take 'em away, boys!
Billy: Hey. Freak. ...Watch your back.
Guard: That's enough out of you, lout! I've got a nice cozy cell all set up for you two.

Make sure he gets the one right next to the Golbez knockoff. I'm sure those two meeting one another is going to be great for everyone.

Morgan: Let's report back in with the Captain. I'm sure he will be pleased with our work.

Well, 10% of our work.

Morgan: ...You two did pretty good out there. I admit I wasn't convinced you guys were the real deal until now.
Dren: I can hardly blame you. Lyssa doesn't exactly inspire confidence. And you haven't even heard her puns yet.
Lyssa: I was thinking maybe something like "Hey Captain Birdface, we caught your lost cuckoos!"
Morgan: ...Please do not address Captain Stonelark as "Captain Birdface".
Lyssa: "Mr. One Arm"?
Morgan: What? No! That doesn't even make sense.
Lyssa: Fine, fine. "Mr. Captain-pants" it is.
Dren: Just ignore her.

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Nathan: Welcome back. How did it go?
Morgan: Sir, I'm happy to report we captured the two bandit leaders, Billy and Willy Nafters, aka "Spike" and "Slade". However, we were only able to recover 1000 of the 10000 gold.
Nathan: A shame. But no matter. The important thing is the capture of the bandit leaders. I take it they have already been escorted to their new accomodations?
Morgan: Yes sir. On my order.
Nathan: Good. Job well done, then. You can keep the 1000 as payment for the services of Miss Lyssa and Mr. Jacobs.
(Quest complete! Received 1000 EXP and you can keep the 1000 GP.)

...Mr. Jacobs?

Lyssa: You won't regret it! We're all the hero you could ever need!
Dren: Please ignore her, sir. And thank you. We're happy to help.
Nathan: Yes. About that. I'm afraid Favros has more problems than just a few bandits. I would appreciate it if you two and Miss Kastel worked on the job board, here in town. How much you do is up to you,

All of it. I mean, really. Come on.

Nathan: as long as you take care of the problem in the castle to the north.
Morgan: Problem up north, sir?
Nathan: Yes. There's an old abandoned castle to the northeast of town, through a mountain pass. Monsters had been recently coming from there and making trouble on the plains, so we sent a force to deal with it. We captured and arrested a man by the name of "Angaraxasak"

High Demon Lord of the Burning Legion Demon Lords.

Nathan: who was believed to be behind the influx of monsters. However, as soon as we removed him, the number of monsters doubled! They don't seem to be trying to rescue him, but if this continues, they'll have enough of a force to assault the city. We tried going back to the castle, but the door was sealed up by magic. My men couldn't get in.
Nathan: It's possible this "Angaraxasak" knows something about what's going on. I'm authorizing you three to visit the jail under the Barracks and interrogate him. He might know a way to get inside the castle.
Lyssa: Wow, what a cool name, though! But a bit long. Hmmm...
Nathan: Yes, well. In any case. Those are your orders, Miss Kastel.
Morgan: Yes, sir! You can count on us.
Nathan: I'm sure. Oh, one last thing. The monsters from the castle are quite strong. You may want to do some of the other jobs here in town before you tackle the castle.

yes yes I know GOD I'll do the job board!

Nathan: I've also heard rumors of another bandit stronghold to the southwest of town, due south of the pass to Senn. I'll leave the specifics up to you. Dismissed.
Lyssa: Later, Sir Captain Pants!

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby Friday » Fri Jun 30, 2017 4:35 pm

If there's anything else to do at the bandit camp, I missed it, because I left for Favros at this point.


Nah, you got everything, looks like. I mean, I can't know if you found every chest and random hidden item in a barrel.

bandits talking about chumps and bandits, wet blanket


my original draft of this had them going on and on, each time making more and more complex logic puzzles that you had to answer correctly to continue (like "Two men are standing next to each other, one says 'the man next to me is an Insane Bandit' the other says 'the man next to me is a Sane Chump' with 'insane' meaning that they say the opposite of what they usually do) while the option to end it was always there, just to see how long I could go until the player got annoyed, gave up, and killed the bandits.
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Tue Jul 04, 2017 1:01 pm

It's taken about two weeks to update maybe ninety minutes of gameplay. I thought I'd be less busy this summer, sorry. Anyhow, Morgan pulls the party into another invitation to her house before we set out.

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Sam: Shame about the money.
Dren: Yeah. But like the Captain said, it's more important that we caught those two.
Dren: Lyssa! Slow down on those Waffles!

thwack thwack thwack, horse whinny. Anyway, you can't fool me. The thing on Lyssa's plate is a pie, not waffles. I know the difference. I went to culinary school.

Sam: Never thought I'd ever see someone that little who could eat that much, that fast.
Dren: Lyssa can consume up to ten times her bodyweight in waffles. I've seen it. We used to call her "The Black Hole of Senn."
Lyssa:
Lyssa:
Lyssa:
Lyssa: *burrrrrrrp*
Lyssa: All done! Thanks for the food!

Every time a game has the "tiny girl eats a ridiculous amount of food in one sitting" scene I remember the bit in Wild ARMs where they pull the same thing and handwave it with "using magic burns a lot of calories". Since Lyssa's the party mage, that works here too.

Izzy: Me too! Me too! Mommy! Mommy! Can I play with Lyssie now?
Morgan: Did you finish all your vegetables?
Izzy: Yep! See! All gone!

Aside from Morgan's and Dren's side salads, there's not much greenery on the table. Unless that blob of purple stuff is some sort of killer mutant cauliflower or something, it looks like Izzy's eating the same wafflepie as Lyssa.
If we're going with Belgian food in our vaguely-European fantasy setting, to pair with the waffles, then maybe there's endive in cream sauce or roasted sprouts or something -- the sort of thing little kids wouldn't care much for and would be reluctant to eat. Maybe they're potato waffles and baked beans to go with their roast chicken, pie, and pile of purple goo.

Sorry. Culinary school.


Morgan: Then yeah, you can.
Izzy: Yaaaaaaayyyy!
Lyssa: Yaaaaayyyy!
Izzy: Let's go play hide and seek, Lyssie!
Lyssa: Yes, I will... but...
Izzy: But?
Lyssa: ... But I have this horrible pain in my arm...
Izzy: Aaaaaaahhh~!
Lyssa: Oh no, here it comes!
Dren: I remember you said this was to blame for when you knocked over that festival stand.
Lyssa: The...


Well, Lyssa calls it "DARK HAND" but you get the idea. Izzy and Lyssa go run in circles in the other room for the rest of the scene.

Morgan: So what made you decide to become an adventurer, Dren?
Dren: At first, it was just to humor Lyssa. She always wanted to be a "hero". Whatever that means. But later, I realized she would need someone to keep an eye on her if she was serious about leaving Senn.
Morgan: She seems capable enough, despite her... personality. I take it those bandits we captured used to bully her. She handled them well.
Dren: I suppose. ...I just worry that she doesn't know what the world really is. She's so... I don't know.
Sam: Are you sure that's why you're traveling with her? Lyssa may be Lyssa, but she's seen how ugly the world can be. You should know that more than most. Maybe the reason you're with her doesn't have anything to do with her, and more to do with you.

Sam don't fuck around.

Dren: ...Maybe. I've always been like her big brother. I guess I just feel responsible for her.
Morgan: If you think of yourself as her big brother, then it's normal to feel that way. I know it took a long time to convince Sam that I could take care of myself.
Sam: You were always good at it. We make a good team.
Dren: If you don't mind me asking, how did you become a Templar?
Morgan: Our parents died when I was nine. Sam was only eleven. The Templar took us in. I grew up living in the barracks and the church. I always admired the Templar. Wielding magic and a sword. Battling monsters. Fighting for justice. That kind of thing. Kid stuff.
Dren: Ha. You weren't so different from Lyssa, then.
Sam: It was pretty natural for Morgan to join their ranks when she became old enough. She had always been a fighter.
Dren: And you?
Sam: Heh. Well, somebody has to stay here and take care of Izzy.
Dren: Where's the father?

Long, awkward pause.

Dren: Er... sorry.
Morgan: It's fine. ...I was young. I had just joined the Templar a year ago. I met a man from a nearby town.

The nearby towns being Kye and Senn, mind you.

Morgan: He was... what I thought I wanted. Things didn't work out. I...
Morgan: It was a long time ago.
Dren: ... I see.
Sam: Morgan...
Morgan: It's getting late. I'm turning in. Goodnight.

And Morgan leaves, walking past Lyssa and Izzy to the far end of the house.

Sam: Don't mind her. She's very sensitive when it comes to Isabella. She's the best kid in the world. Morgan would die if she lost her.
Dren: She could quit the Templar, couldn't she? Come home and take care of Isabella full time?
Sam: She would if she had to. But... She also feels like she owes the Templar, for taking care of us when we were kids. It's dumb. I've told her over and over that she's the only one who feels that way. The Captain would accept her resignation without complaint. He knows how much Izzy means to her. But it's not like other Templar don't have kids, too. Everyone is fighting for someone. Just like you, Dren.
Dren: Are you implying I fight for that idiot?
Sam: I'm not implying anything. Well, goodnight.

I-i-i-it's not like I like her or anything! B-b-b-baka!

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Tue Jul 04, 2017 1:23 pm

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And in the night, another dream...

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Another dreamscape of a distant voice calling for Lyssa while Lyssa acts baffled. Also the water is starlight again, and out past the starlight is. After a bit of wandering, Lyssa meets the blonde elf from the game intro.

Lyssa: ...Hello?
Elf: Lyssa...
Lyssa: ...This is another dream? There was that starlight again, where the water should be. I remember. But... I've never been here before.
Elf: Lyssa...
Lyssa: Are you my mother?
Elf: Lyssa... Please... I can't... Stay for long...

A simple "yes" or "no" would suffice, needlessly cryptic woman who only speaks in ellipses.

Lyssa: You must be her. You have to be her.
Needlessly Cryptic Woman Who Only Speaks In Ellipses: Lyssa... you must... Listen now...
Lyssa: Mother, what is it?
Needlessly Cryptic Woman Who Only Speaks In Ellipses: The trees... Lyssa... Windseal... You must... Come... Windseal... Dark Forces... Under attack... The Void... We Elves... The trees... We must be... Released...
Lyssa: Windseal? Elves? Mother... I don't understand! Where are you? Why did you abandon me!?
Needlessly Cryptic Woman Who Only Speaks in Ellipses: Lyssa... I'm sorry... Please... Time is...
Lyssa: Mother! Wait!
Needlessly Cryptic Woman Who Only Speaks in Ellipses: Lyssa... Be strong...

Sheesh. It's like she can't even hear what Lyssa is saying. Bloody typical elf behavior.

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Dren: Yeah?
Lyssa: ... Uh, nevermind.
Morgan: It's a beautiful day. Shall we get started?
Lyssa: Yeah! Let's go!

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In preparation for spending the dosh I got from the bandit camp over at the market, I unequipped everything from everyone. And with raw stats laid bare, we can see that Morgan's stats looking a bit overinflated upon her recruitment were largely due to most of her kit giving her bonuses to both ATK and MAT. On her own, she's about as good a mage as Lyssa, rather than a red mage who can do what both Lyssa and Dren can do.

The shops at Favros have a huge offering of stuff to get. I took quite a while copying down stats for the best armors and weapons -- again, no reason to waste money on partial upgrades -- to figure out what works best for whom. Upgrades aren't exactly linear, especially when it comes to accessories, but overall there aren't all that many difficult decisions to make. Morgan can save up for a Templar's Sword that gives a big bonus to ATK and a fair bonus to MAT; Lyssa instead gets the Templar's Wand that gives good bonuses to both. I'm pretty sure I'd rather have Templar's Wand and a Shield than the Templar's Staff, with its bigger boost to MAT than either the Wand or Sword but is two-handed and comes with a stiff AGI penalty. And so on, for headgear, armor, and accessories.

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Tue Jul 04, 2017 3:32 pm

Maybe I'll update more often if I don't have to transcribe so much of the game script into text. So here's a text-heavy portion. Read it your damn self:


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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby Friday » Tue Jul 04, 2017 11:27 pm

Sorry. Culinary school.


I realized long after writing all that, on closer inspection, that the waffle graphic was actually a pie.

GUESS I'VE GOT WAFFLE PROBLEMS
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jul 08, 2017 5:26 pm

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The treasure map hint we got says that the loot is found where the horses pasture. Well... uh, I found one horse on my way through the bandit camp on my way to nab Spike and Sludge. It was hungry. I fed it a carrot. Since it didn't do anything else I didn't bring it up, but maybe that's where I need to look for the treasure.

Turns out nope, that's not where the treasure is. I just went through half of the dungeon I'd just cleared for no reason.


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So let's check out the camp just south of the pass to Senn instead. This is the "recommended level 12" quest from the job board, though it doesn't come with a questgiver to talk to (or get a reward from, and no, Captain Stonelark doesn't count). It's just on the board to remind you that it's here.

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Poor Carl.

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There are horses to be found a little way in, so...

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If you listen to the chef gripe for a while, you're given the chance to thank him for all his hard work. If you do, your reward is a Rainbow Trout.

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There's a lot to do in this little room -- one box tints the screen red, another green, another blue. One is a warp back to the start. A couple of crates click or shake the screen. But no matter what, you always get teleported back to start when you approach the chest. In desperation I let the timer run out, and nothing happens if it does, but you still can't get what's in there.

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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jul 08, 2017 5:45 pm

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Further in, two bandits are arguing about something they stashed in a chest upstairs.

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The Amazing Talking Axe, Gansel was found!
The Amazing Talking Axe, Gansel: Hey guys!
The Stupendous Awesome Axe, Gansel: Thanks for getting me out of there!
The Best Axe Ever, Gansel: Some stupid bandits shoved me in there for some reason, right after I fell through this weird portal.
Super Sharp and Cool Gansel: Probably because they couldn't deal with how much cooler I was than them.
Gansel, The Destroyer: But now you super cool people have found me, and boy, let me tell you.
Gansel, the not-so-great: You guys are in for a treat, because I'm really -- Wait, crap, I screwed up my thing. Hold on.
The Amazing Gansel, Doom of Evil: There we go.
Gansel, the Ultimate Weapon: As you can see by my title, I'm actually the best weapon. In the game. World. Gameworld.

I'm still holding out for Ragnost the World-Gorger, but sure.

Vorpal +15 Gansel: I am capable of decapitating every single thing in one hit. Yes, even things without heads, like mountains, or fish.
Gansel, really cool: Whaddya mean, fish have heads?
The Great Gansel: You know what doesn't have heads? Orcs. At least not when I'm around!
Lyssa: What's an "orc"?
Gansel, Hater of Orcs: Oh, they're the most disgusting creature imaginable. Far, far worse than Beholders, or Demogorgons, or Tarrasques.
Orcs Suck: In fact, the only possible thing worse than an Orc, is two Orcs.
Orcs Suck Really Badly: That's the worst possible thing ever. Two Orcs. No, wait. Three Orcs. ...Holy crap. I just thought of something worse.
Dren: Four orcs?
Gansel, Way Super Smart: No, idiot. Five Orcs.
Lyssa: Are you talking about Porcs?
Gansel, The Ender: No, I don't care about stupid pun versions.
Gansel, Sun Killer: Anyway, whaddya say? Shall we join forces and fight evil?
Dren: No thanks.
Plasma Gansel: WHAT?!? How could you turn me down? You must be even dumber than those bandits!
Dren: Because you're super annoying.
Gansel, Not Annoying: Man, everyone keeps saying that. What the heck? How am I annoying?
Dren: Okay, listen. You can come with us, but... You have to only speak when spoken to, and you have to stop doing that thing with your title.
Gansel, What Do You Mean That Thing With My Title: Aww, man! No way!
Dren: Fine. Put him back in the box.
Gansel, no no, not the box: Noooo! Fine, fine. I accept your stupid conditions.
Gansel: But I have a condition myself.
Dren: Yeessss?
Gansel: Whenever you kill a dragon, you have to do a cool pose, you know, like, you slash through him and I'm out to one side in your hand, and then BOOM the dragon explodes, and then--
Lyssa: YES OH MY GOD.
Gansel: I KNOW RIGHT?!
Lyssa: AND THEN IT TURNS OUT THAT THE DRAGON WAS ONLY THE SERVANT --
Gansel: OF AN EVEN BIGGER DRAGON!!
Lyssa: BUT THEN I DO A KICKFLIP AND --
Gansel: YOU LAND ON THE DRAGON'S BACK AND HIT IT WITH ME AND THE DRAGON IS LIKE "OW" AND THEN --
Dren: OH MY GOD SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU
Lyssa: Ignore him. He's just grumpy because his axe doesn't shoot lasers.
Gansel Who Can Shoot Lasers: Yeah I totally can.
Dren: What did I say about the title thing?!
Gansel: Sorry.
Lyssa: Welcome to the party, pal.
Gansel: Now I know what a TV dinner feels like.
Lyssa: Huh?
Gansel: Oh I guess you don't have that here. Nevermind, let's go!
(Gansel joined. In your inventory.)

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The bandits, as you can imagine, are just glad to be rid of the thing.

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nosimpleway
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jul 08, 2017 5:58 pm

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And in the next building is a much less talkative weapon. This one counts as blunt-type, rather than axe-type, but has stats pretty similar to Gansel's. Some ultimate weapon that guy is.

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If you fetch the hams from the counter and give them to the bandits, they laugh at you and attack anyway.

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But it's true, you can in fact Ask Gansel for advice. Advice such as:
Attack its weak point for massive damage!
or
Oooh! Oooh! I know! Hit them until they fall down!
or
You're asking me for battle advice? Uh.... OK, here's what you do. First, don't talk to your weapon in the middle of the fight. Unless your weapon is me. Then yeah, you should totally talk to me. Because I know everything there is to know about everything there is to know about everything to know about everything. Uh. I think. I might not know everything about like, everything that nobody knows everything about. But I DEFINITELY know everything about not knowing everything about not knowing everything about everything. Okay, I forgot what you asked me. But I'm sure I was super helpful, right?

So maybe just don't bother.

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The bandit outpost isn't actually all that long, there's just something to do in every building you pass by.

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Well, almost every building. This little tent has a sleeping bandit and a rusty sword you can take, but not much else.

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All proceeds go to the children's hospital for bandit kids whose parents have been killed by roving, murderous Templar
Show up and have a great time! Baked goods, snacks, drinks, fun family oriented activities all day long! Including a one-legged race and face-painting
All are welcome to attend! See you there!
Except you, Carl.

I kind of hope Carl is somewhere out there as a wandering monster or something so I can find out why everybody hates the guy.

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There's only one building left in the outpost. While there's not much on the ground floor, there's a ladder leading up, and if you can spot it, a basement.

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A basement with a wondering monster.

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For the most part Lyssa cast Gale to keep Dagger locked down with Stun while Dren and Morgan pound on Cloak.

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And once Cloak is dealt with Lyssa... uh, continues to cast Gale to deny Dagger any turns.

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Cloak's Dagger is ATK+10 and MAT+5, making it a decent replacement for Morgan's Sword. The bonuses to AGI, LUK, and her crit and evade aren't bad, either.

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nosimpleway
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jul 08, 2017 6:10 pm

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"Name of my cat"
"Name of my dog"
"My birthday."
"Name of my cat123"
"Name of my dog123"
"qwerty"
"Dragonblade"
"FireDragonAxe"
"Crystalknife"
"Hey, Dan, it's me, Jake"
"Hey, Jake, it's me, Dan"
"hey it's me ur brother"
"Hey it's me, Carl"
"***********"
"Correct Horse Battery Staple"
"Bandits rule and Templar drool"
"Bandits R Cool"
"Oops, gopher hole"
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there"
"Let me in"
"Justin Bailey"
"Up up down down left right left right b a start"
"IDDQD"
"I been through the desert on a horse"
"With no name, it felt good"
"To get out of the rain"
"aYu218gGu91lo(72naghdf$672_jas9715"
"173467321476charlie32789777643tango732victor7311"
"7888732476789764376, Lock"
"Jumping Jacks"
"I don't know"
"Help! A giant monster is chasing me! Let me in!"
(Give up)

Did you catch the answer? If you get it right, he lets you in. If you don't, he refuses, but points out that you can probably bruteforce it by leaving the basement and coming back. His memory is really bad. He probably shouldn't be doing this job.

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Which isn't to say there aren't more competent bandits inside the vault waiting to random-encounter you anyway.

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The various chests are mostly money, but given how little is dropped in encounters, an extra 1200 or so GP doesn't go amiss. The real prize is the Boots of Speed, natch.

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After the expansive basement, it's kind of a surprise that the upper floor is this tiny little room.

Bandit: How's it going?
Bandit: Fight you? Nah, no thanks. I'm not really into the whole violence part of being a bandit, you know?
Bandit: For me, it's more about the face-painting and the thievery, you know? Oh, not that I would rob you guys. Don't worry.
Bandit: And the kids, of course. So many bandit kids are left homeless by Templar every year. If someone doesn't spy on them for the master, who w--

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They're everywhere.

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nosimpleway
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Re: Another LP? It must be Friday! Let's play Windseal!

Postby nosimpleway » Sat Jul 08, 2017 6:13 pm

And that's that for the Bandit base. Like I said before, there's no questgiver for this one, so there's no one back in town who gives a reward for doing it. Not like there's a boss or anything to serve as a target for the quest, anyway. Spike and Sludge are still in jail.

So... uh... wandering monster fights, I guess?

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First target: this asshole!

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The fight stays true to its inspiration. The two flames are invincible and pelt you with Firebolt spells, but the old man doesn't do anything. He just stands there and soaks hits.

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And soaks hits. And soaks hits. And soaks hits. And soaks hits. Check out my AP here -- this is after I'd run myself dry on potions.

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Hey, remember how the old men in Legend of Zelda are completely invincible?

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