Hottest TF2 Husbando
Moderators: Friday, LaserBeing
Hottest TF2 Husbando
I did Overwatch, it's only fair.
Scout
Pros: Look at this?! And this?! And this here? Look at all of this!
Cons: He finishes really quick
Soldier
Pros: Handsome as hell, grizzled square jaw, a man's man
Cons: Spends most of his time teleporting bread, talking to severed heads
Demoman
Pros: Scottish, has a giant "sword"
Cons: One errant twitch, and KABLOWIE
Heavy
Pros: Hardworking, good provider, can lift you up where you belong
Cons: Won't stop telling you how much his sperm is worth per minute while ejaculating, not the sharpest tool in the shed
Medic
Pros: Smart, capable, can heal any injury you sustain
Cons: His bird keeps flying inside you and getting all dirty, the severed heads he keeps in the fridge judge you whenever you get a midnight snack
Spy
Pros: Suave, sophisticated, can shapeshift into anyone for bedroom fun
Cons: He doesn't really love anyone (except Scout's mom)
Pyro
Pros: Latex. *eyebrows*
Cons: While turning up the heat in bed is usually regarded as a good thing, in Pyros case, this can easily get out of hand
Sniper
Pros: Steady work, is not a crazed gunman
Cons: Gone most of the time, comes home wearing weird costumes
Engy
Pros: Smart, capable, can build you anything
Cons: Refuses to talk about anything other than practical solutions that involve turrets to any problem you may be having
*********************
Groups of 3, 2 advance.
Scout
Pros: Look at this?! And this?! And this here? Look at all of this!
Cons: He finishes really quick
Soldier
Pros: Handsome as hell, grizzled square jaw, a man's man
Cons: Spends most of his time teleporting bread, talking to severed heads
Demoman
Pros: Scottish, has a giant "sword"
Cons: One errant twitch, and KABLOWIE
Heavy
Pros: Hardworking, good provider, can lift you up where you belong
Cons: Won't stop telling you how much his sperm is worth per minute while ejaculating, not the sharpest tool in the shed
Medic
Pros: Smart, capable, can heal any injury you sustain
Cons: His bird keeps flying inside you and getting all dirty, the severed heads he keeps in the fridge judge you whenever you get a midnight snack
Spy
Pros: Suave, sophisticated, can shapeshift into anyone for bedroom fun
Cons: He doesn't really love anyone (except Scout's mom)
Pyro
Pros: Latex. *eyebrows*
Cons: While turning up the heat in bed is usually regarded as a good thing, in Pyros case, this can easily get out of hand
Sniper
Pros: Steady work, is not a crazed gunman
Cons: Gone most of the time, comes home wearing weird costumes
Engy
Pros: Smart, capable, can build you anything
Cons: Refuses to talk about anything other than practical solutions that involve turrets to any problem you may be having
*********************
Groups of 3, 2 advance.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
First up!
Demoman
Spy
Pyro
Vote for 2 to advance.
Demoman
Spy
Pyro
Vote for 2 to advance.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Demoman 5
Spy 6
Pyro 3
Not a brobdingnagian fan of the latex eh
Or maybe you guys just don't want a husband who is so hot under the collar
get it
Next up:
Scout
Soldier
Sniper
Spy 6
Pyro 3
Not a brobdingnagian fan of the latex eh
Or maybe you guys just don't want a husband who is so hot under the collar
get it
Next up:
Scout
Soldier
Sniper
- Mongrel
- Posts: 21397
- Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 6:28 pm
- Location: There's winners and there's losers // And I'm south of that line
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Hm. Three characters who probably don't even know how to find their dicks, let alone use them.
Well, at least Soldier is a manly man's man's Man.
Well, at least Soldier is a manly man's man's Man.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
how is scout losing
did you not see him? and this? and that? and all this?
did you not see him? and this? and that? and all this?
- Mongrel
- Posts: 21397
- Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 6:28 pm
- Location: There's winners and there's losers // And I'm south of that line
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
He's even got a bucket of chicken!
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Sniper smells like pee, soldier has no concept of love that isn't towards a weapon, and scout is good at kissing! Granted, Scout only kisses his reflection but that's gotta count for something.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
I am a fried chicken hussy. (We all know the scout dies a virgin, but that won't stop me from voting for him to get at the chicken)
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Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Scout 7
Soldier 4
Sniper 7
So far, tastes have run toward "less insane" with the elimination of Pyro and Soldier and the advancement of Demo, Spy, Scout and Sniper.
Last in the first round:
Heavy
Medic
Engy
Soldier 4
Sniper 7
So far, tastes have run toward "less insane" with the elimination of Pyro and Soldier and the advancement of Demo, Spy, Scout and Sniper.
Last in the first round:
Heavy
Medic
Engy
- Mongrel
- Posts: 21397
- Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 6:28 pm
- Location: There's winners and there's losers // And I'm south of that line
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Heavy and Medic are already a happily married couple.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
But if things continue toward dumping the crazy, Medic is next on the chopping block.
And I mean, come on. Heavy is a brobdingnagian teddy bear and Engy's got that sweet Texas drawl. What does Medic have? A bonesaw and a filthy bird? No contest.
And I mean, come on. Heavy is a brobdingnagian teddy bear and Engy's got that sweet Texas drawl. What does Medic have? A bonesaw and a filthy bird? No contest.
- Mongrel
- Posts: 21397
- Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 6:28 pm
- Location: There's winners and there's losers // And I'm south of that line
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
The medic probably also thinks that consent is some kind of jailhouse perfume.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Medic: if he lasts as long as the average ubercharge that's probably a record as far as TF2 performance goes. That said, if I had a nickel every time he shot his load while accidentally locked on to a scoot or sniper, I could build my own Li'l Chew Chew. Also: dirty bird. Doity, stinking, filthy, boids.
Engie: If anyone can get an erection it's this guy. Sadly, whacking it with a wrench for decades has made that a theoretical exercise only.
Heavy: "Don't run. Is only ham." A lot of ham. sure, that ham has been farther up Germany than General Zhukov in 1945, but hey the times, they are a-changin'. I guess. What were we on about? Who started this shit? I have to pick one of these losers right. ok well I choose
the guy who can teleport me inside the no-clip observation room prop on 2Fort
Engie: If anyone can get an erection it's this guy. Sadly, whacking it with a wrench for decades has made that a theoretical exercise only.
Heavy: "Don't run. Is only ham." A lot of ham. sure, that ham has been farther up Germany than General Zhukov in 1945, but hey the times, they are a-changin'. I guess. What were we on about? Who started this shit? I have to pick one of these losers right. ok well I choose
the guy who can teleport me inside the no-clip observation room prop on 2Fort
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Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Heavy 3
Medic 4
Engy 6
Our first round has ended.
Our remaining six husbandos are:
Scout
Demoman
Medic
Spy
Sniper
Engy
Same deal. Two groups of three, vote 2. This will give us our TOP FOUR.
Medic 4
Engy 6
Our first round has ended.
Our remaining six husbandos are:
Scout
Demoman
Medic
Spy
Sniper
Engy
Same deal. Two groups of three, vote 2. This will give us our TOP FOUR.
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
First up:
Scout
Demoman
Medic
Scout
Demoman
Medic
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Ah the truth about alcohol and erections. Sorry, Tavish.
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Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
Scout 6
Demoman 6
Medic 1
Next up:
Spy
Sniper
Engy
Demoman 6
Medic 1
Next up:
Spy
Sniper
Engy
Re: Hottest TF2 Husbando
"weird costumes"
"disguises as sniper wearing weird costume"
Maybe that's my kink. Don't shame.
"disguises as sniper wearing weird costume"
Maybe that's my kink. Don't shame.
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