The Star Trek Thread

[Thad]

IIRC the first time I saw that movie I spent the first half of it thinking Sigourney Weaver was Jamie Lee Curtis.

[Friday]

But mostly that flick just makes me want to fuck an octopus.

oh thank god I'm not the only one

[Friday]

the actual correct way to watch the Trek movies is thusly:

step 1: watch Galaxy Quest

as much as I suck GQ's dick, Wrath of Khan (2) and Voyage Home (4) are both exceptionally good movies, and Undiscovered Country (6) is pretty good.

[Mongrel]

Undiscovered Country is just plain fun.

[Büge]

You know, Search for Spock is unfairly maligned because it's odd-numbered. The Motion Picture is a grey, joyless slog and Final Frontier is William Shatner's graven image of himself. The third movie's only sin is not being as good as the films that flank it.

[Mongrel]

It's kind of derpy, but it's not awful. It's a solid middle for the 2-3-4 trilogy.

[McDohl]

You can ignore 5 and tack on 6 for 2-3-4-6, and it works great for a real Kirk character arc.

[Thad]

Pegg to co-write Star Trek 3. With any luck this will establish the new series as being the opposite of the old series, and the odd movies being the good ones.

[Blossom]

If you count Galaxy Quest, the pattern continues to hold up, and why the fuck would you not count Galaxy Quest?

[Thad]

Galaxy Quest is between Insurrection and Nemesis? That makes sense.

[Sharkey]

Hold Me Closer, Tiny Riker...



Haha, nobody cares about this fucking game.

[Sharkey]

STO just keeps on reminding me of how much I don't know about Star Trek. At one point I had encyclopedic knowledge of everything in this particular universe, but I pretty much checked out before TNG even ended. Now all I have to go on is some bad movies and the half dozen episodes of Deep Space Voyager: The Wrath of Rod Stewart I happened to catch at 2AM. Meanwhile, this game keeps expecting me to care about about meeting Weird Chef, The-Doctor-not-The-Doctor, Space Indian who isn't Bravestar, etc. I'm near the level cap and still running bright blue 60s phasers on a TOS constitution because they're the only things in the game I have anything resembling an emotional attachment to. On the plus side, the userbase leans pretty damn casual, so that kind of determined underachieving is pretty well tolerated when it's on an obvious joke character.

So far my favorite thing ever is that there's a Borg world boss that's pretty obviously supposed to be based on V'Ger. Which barely makes a lick of sense, but it totally uses that blaster beam sound effect when it shows up. I just about shit myself with glee and Tiny Riker immediately flew his shitbox 60s Constitution straight at the mouth of thing. Turns out its plasma ball weapon looks just like the one in the movie, except at point-blank it has a friendly fire effect that actually made my suicide attempt ridiculously effective. The other players floating around seemed to think that was pretty fuckin rad.

I don't really have much of a point, other than I hadn't realized there was such a stark contrast between the amount of giveafuck I possessed about the startreks when I was a kid vs pretty much everything that happened with it after I hit puberty. I don't know whether to blame that on the franchise or just growing up. Probably a bit of both.

[Büge]

Well, you're in luck, Sharkey, because today is the 14th anniversary of Enterprise. You should binge-watch the series and see how far you get! :D

[Esperath]

Or you can just skip to the finale watch Fat Jonathan Frakes pretending to be Season 6 Riker.

[Sharkey]

I'll have to add Emergency Fat Riker Hologram to my bridge crew.

I always dug the mission architect in CoH, so I'm half thinking of putting some bullshit tongue-in-cheek thing together in the foundry. I adored the email from Cryptic saying that even though everyone in the office loved my "Night of the Lovebots" arc, they couldn't include it with the Dev Picks missions for probably obvious reasons.

The ToS for the foundry is pretty fucking weird in places, though:

You can:
Use character names from any show and the first ten movies
Yay!

But not their likeliness (i.e. it ok to talk about "Data", but not to create an NPC that looks like Brent Spiner)
Makes sense, I guess. Way too many licensing issues there. But it does rule out a "multiverse of fuckup Rikers" story. Sigh.

Don't be too critical or controversial with your story telling. Check the paragraphs about political, religious and other topics.
So... no Black/White vs. White/Black aliens? This one's just incredibly vague, and rules out pretty much every episode of Star Trek that was worth a damn.

Do not display the use of any drugs (even legal administration by doctors)
So no NPC can administer a hypo, even though it's actually a normal game mechanic? Shit, I'm pretty sure there are skills that give a bonus to shooting up. Whatever.

Do not display people with disabilities (VISOR etc.)
Okay, this is just baffling. I can't imagine any kind of ass-covering reasoning behind it that wasn't already covered by the broad "controversial topics" injunction, and in fact it comes off as borderline offensive. Especially where lint-screen sunglasses and assorted variants are already an in-game costume option sported by shitloads of players and NPCs. Just... what the fuck?

[Smiler]

This made me go look at all of the Star Trek ornaments that exist because my brother always got most of the TOS ones for Christmas from someone. I'm wondering what's gonna happen first: more TNG movie ornaments or one based on Spock's Brain?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Thad]

Hollywood Reporter: New Star Trek TV series coming, digital-first on CBS's online platform that nobody gives a fuck about.

Alex Kurtzman is in charge, so set your expectations accordingly.

I would expect it to be set in the new films' universe, though the article notes ongoing rights disputes between the movie and TV divisions of Paramount, so there's a possibility CBS will stick with the original universe. Wouldn't bet on it, though.

[Mothra]

Could be good?

Kurtzman worked on both Mission Impossible III (the good one)... and Transformers.

[Mothra]

2009 - Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - co-writer
2014 - The Amazing Spider-Man 2 - co-writer, executive producer

Welp.

[Blossom]

This is the first major project he's done without being attached to Roberto Orci, the deranged 9/11 truther. So I would expect it'd be a step above.