<+Kazz> say, within 1 point.
* Ophelia (
momorin@00-000-00-000.cable.ubr27.sgyl.blueyonder.co.uk) has joined #dickjokes
<Doomykins> ;_; where are boards
<Brentai> In my pants.
<+Shana> Ophelia Ophelia?
<JDigital> Shana: it's, like, lyrai or someone
<+Shana> .
<+Shana> I'm Lyrai you dumb fuck
<+Kazz> MAYBE
<+Kazz> IF YOU DIDN'T CHANGE YOUR NAME EVERY FUCKING DAY
<+Kazz> WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO GUESS
<+Shana> SHUT UP, FATAZZ
<+Kazz> well
<JDigital> yeah this gives the illusion we have more women
<+Kazz> don't call people dumb fucks for not recognizing you
<The_Capn> Kazz: who else makes wildly inappropriate horatios
<+Kazz> when you take every precaution to prevent recognition
<Ophelia> hay ^^
<The_Capn> I mean, depending on your resolution, the last one hasn't even left the screen yet
<SimonTheDigger> this so called "energy gum" is kind of bleh
<+Shana> Ophelia
<+Shana> Are you new here
<+Kazz> it could also be a zambie
<Ophelia> What kind of question is that? ^^
<+Kazz> well
<+Kazz> y'see
<+Kazz> i just got off the phone with your grandmother
<+Shana> Yes
<+Shana> Have you been on the phone with your grandmother recently Ophelia
<Ophelia> Yes
<Ophelia> She said good girls forgive and forget
* You were kicked from #dickjokes by Squizzle (Stop changing your nick.)
* Rejoined channel #dickjokes
* Topic is 'Hey artists:
index.php?topic=4169.0 | Friday, stop messing around with my nick. | I am leaving the !fatal trigger on overnight. Knock yourselves out.'
* Set by
Vance!zerolinar@adsl-00-00-00-000.dsl.i ... global.net on Tue Nov 24 01:37:31
<Shana> :(
* ChanServ sets mode: +v Shana
<Upthorn> !lyrai
<+Shana> DWARVES WITH GUNS.
<The_Capn>
http://www.crowdedstreet.net/alex/sever ... _later.jpg<Upthorn> err right I meant
* Upthorn inserts a quarter into lyrai
<+Shana> Bajumbo moi noi noi jecker Dabatto bunkergait jun jun Nora juerue-rotto pura-pura petto Puraret dum dum Papuranoi noi noi jecker Dabatto bumperget tum tum Ora poerketino bookeran tan-tan-so Bokeretyo kyenturanai mimani unlalhood-cha-la Terra hooki-ra pishi-to diki-ra poody-to Seni-kidi koseibo Kokorenkyo yenturanai mimani unlalhood-cha-la Terra hooki-ra shishi-sho tusura hajiki yo!
<+Shana> So why are you in the uk Ophelia
<Ophelia> You sure ask a lot of questions ^^
<+Kazz> the grandmother thing, though, it's a great in-joke now
<+Kazz> so
<+Kazz> i forgive you
<Zararara> good news
<+Shana> You're sure dodgy about answering them!
<Zararara> I'm not leaving next month
<Zararara> I'm leaving today
<@Squizzle> wat
<+Kazz> lyrai stop being a cunt
<+Kazz> zara what
<Zararara> they're paying me to stay at home now
<Ophelia> Look I'm sorry but I don't have to answer right now. My life has got quite complicated and I thought maybe I could find some solace online. Hell knows I've not been finding it in fiction.
<@Squizzle> Lyrai, if this turns out not to be Ophrealia, we get a nice laugh out of it and move on. If it is, well, that's pretty nice.
<Ophelia> I'll be back later, see if anyone cares then.
<JDigital> Ophelia: which finalfight regular under a comedy new nick are you again
<JDigital> zara: did they fire you from your job that you hate
<Ophelia> Screw you, pisswad. You're just jealous because you didn't get to see my tits.
<JDigital> tits or gtfo
<JDigital> also why are you in england
<+Kazz> things are less complicated in england, not more.
<+Kazz> they don't even have cold beer there.
<+Kazz> THEY'RE SAVAGES.
<Ophelia> MAYBE I wanted to go somewhere cultured.
<+Kazz> i went to england.
<+Shana> so how's nimduin
<Ophelia> I should've known there would be hostility; I'm going to leave now. I MAY come back.
<+Kazz> it was awful. everybody sounds smart, like in the movies, but they're actually as dumb as anyone else.
<+Kazz> it was really confusing.
* Zararara waves to Ophelia
<+Kazz> NO STAY
<Zararara> hit ophelia
<+Kazz> STAY OPHY
<Zararara> how's up
<+Kazz> STAY
<Zararara> er
<Zararara> hey
<+Kazz> I LOVE YOU
<Zararara> not hit
* Ophelia (
momorin@00-00-000-000.cable.ubr27.sgyl.blueyonder.co.uk) has left #dickjokes
<+Kazz> fucking cunt
<+Kazz> i hope she chokes on cocks
<+Kazz> you too lyrai, choke on cocks
<+Kazz> actually everybody here can choke on cocks
<+Kazz> fucking drama queens
<+Shana> see kazz
<Zararara> kazz
<Zararara> it's not your fault kazz
<+Shana> when she left ff and tried to set up camp elsehwere in the internet
<+Shana> she chose a community I was in
<+Kazz> "I'm gonna go someplace where I faked my own death and then I'm gonna talk about myself. HEY WHY ISN'T ANYONE HAPPY TO SEE ME"
<JDigital> !ophelia
<+Shana> and tried to do the same "make this guy fall for me and break up his relationship but then just be a bitch and reveal i've been stringing him along"
<+Kazz> hey zara i'm sorry to hear that. or i'm happy. whatever you are, i'm that
<+Shana> Except the guy and girl she tried to fuck with ere close friends of mine
<+Shana> so i like to pretend i'm allowed a little extra hostility towards her for that
[16:21] <Brentai> Hey Niku did you actually get through Death in the end?
[16:21] <Niku> Yeah.
[16:22] <Brentai> Okay good.
[16:22] <Niku> I'm in Minewbie right now.
[16:22] <Xerox> Did you actually "get through" Death "in the end"?
[16:22] <Lee-Ham> I got to the second screen of Death!
[16:22] <Moebius> Did you actually "convince to" Death "have buttsex?"
[16:22] <Lee-Ham> Friday told me where the first exit was!
[16:23] <Lee-Ham> I am good at video games
[16:23] <Xerox> Friday told me where the "first exit" was!
[16:23] <Shana> Her vagina?
[16:23] <Xerox> I wasn't going to do it again, but that opportunity and timing was just too good.
[16:23] <Lee-Ham> she said she would let me go through her first exit as long as I let her be player 1
[16:24] <Xerox> I'm not touching that.
[16:24] <Brentai> But Lee-Ham is.
[16:24] <Lee-Ham> but then she just kept hitting pause while I was trying to make a difficult "jump"
[16:25] <Xerox> Yeah, when she's on top, she never lets you go first.
[16:25] <Lee-Ham> it's ok, I got on her square and hit her from below to make her drop her star cards
[16:26] <Brentai> I had sex with Friday in the butt.
[22:25] <notKazz> stush
[22:26] <notKazz> i have
critical business.[22:26] <Stush> D:
[22:26] <Stush> That does more damage then normal business!
<Esperath> aussies love their steaks
<@Silversong> Yeah, I saw their restaurant.
<@Cait> The restaurant that has nothing to do with Australia at all?
<@Silversong> Whatever. There was a digeridoo on the wall. You can't just fake that.
<Esperath> foster's. australian for outback steakhouse.
<@Squizzle> The iPhone doesn't produce the haunting melodies of the Australian outback. Droid digeridoes.
<@Silversong> digeridon't.
<+drethelin> oh no you digerididn't
<+lady_duke> but vaginas dont stick out that way
<+lady_duke> look at that doll
<+lady_duke> her vagina is like, forward
<+lady_duke> protruding outwards from her in a way that they do not realistically
<Esperath> maybe YOU don't have an opposable vagina
<MetalSlime> Taki throws enemies with her vagina
<@Friday> my vagina is capable of bending, flexing, shooting spikes, and accelerating to up to 95 mph.
<MetalSlime> Can you use it for sex, though?
<@Friday> I was describing sex.
<sei> i am disappointed that "bending" was not followed by "spacetime"
<MetalSlime> Sex with Friday sounds like a boss battle
<@Zaratustra> oh, it bends many things
<+lady_duke> hahahahaha
<+lady_duke> oh friday
<sei> inc comment on someone wanting to warp through friday's wormhole
<MetalSlime> With phases
<Esperath> I beat the last boss
<Esperath> I was hard
<@Zaratustra> SHOOT THE CORE
<Friday_San_Diego> Zara you and I should write a Twilight werewolf game
<Friday_San_Diego> Edward: faggot. everyone wins immediately if he dies.
<Friday_San_Diego> Bella: village idiot.
<@Zaratustra> twilight werewolves imprint on a person at random
<@Zaratustra> and then if that person dies
<Friday_San_Diego> Jacob: THE WEREWOLF.
<@Zaratustra> they are Very Unhappy
<Friday_San_Diego> Renesme: double faggot. everyone wins twice immediately if she dies.
<@Zaratustra> this game doesn't seem very balanced
<SimonTheDigger> what if Edward kills Renesme or vice-versa
<Sede> Shmeesme!
<Friday_San_Diego> Very Unhappy werewolves cannot night kill
<Friday_San_Diego> they just mope around all day and automatically self-vote
<Joxam> Friday, the problem with that is you wouldn't be able to destingush them from some of our regular players.
[19:26] John: do you know where I can get good, but cheap, modding done?
[19:26] John: I gotta mod my dick to fuck foreign chicks.
[19:26] Walker: Uh... your dick ought to be region-free, man.
[19:26] John: you sure? it's an 87 model...
[19:27] Walker: Mine's an '82 model and it's region-free.
[19:27] John: well then, I am in business.
[19:27] John: as soon as I find a foreign chick willing to fuck me.
[19:27] Walker: Yes.
[19:27] Walker: That's the problem. Importing them is a bitch.
[19:28] John: I could get one of those mail order brides, but then I'd have to feed it and take care of it...I've already got a hamster, dammit.
[19:29] Walker: And I've got a cat.
[19:29] Walker: I'm sure there's a pussy joke here somewhere.
[19:29] John: actually I was just gonna quote, "a cat is fine too."
<Mr_Saturn>
http://tomopop.com/megahouse-s-one-piec ... 0497.phtml OH GOD NICO ROBIN WITH GLASSES
<Mr_Saturn> HNNNNNG
<Rygaron> I came.
<Brentai> I saw.
<Friday> I came.
[03:54] <+Kazz> I HATE BEING ASKED QUESTIONS
[03:54] <+Kazz> I REFUSE TO EVER BE ASKED A QUESTION
[03:54] <+drethelin> kazz how will you do that
<@YoungFriday> Kayin, every time we talk about fetishes, I imagine you in that top hat, standing over some hapless tied up naked girl with a whip
<@YoungFriday> and you're like IF YOU CAN BEAT TYSON I'LL LET YOU GO
<@YoungFriday> and she's like I'D RATHER JUST GET MY NIPPLES TWEAKED SOME MORE
<Kayin> "As you wish :3"
<Stush> Friday and kayin, sitting in a tree, S I T T I N G
<Kayin> And while I Was doing it, I would be the only thing harder than IWBTG
<@YoungFriday> Man
<@YoungFriday> one thing though.
<@YoungFriday> never ever break up with someone in ANY WAY other than face to face
<@YoungFriday> if you do it over the phone or internets or whatever YOU LOSE
<Stush> Friday, what about smoke signals?
<@YoungFriday> those are acceptable if you are an indian
<Stush> Okay
<Rygaron> I think that only counts if you've officially "starting dating"
<Rygaron> Just like, no second date can be telecommuted.
<@Squizzle> No way. The best way to break up with someone is by dictating a letter to your new partner, asking said new partner to embellish it as s/he pleases, and then mail it off.
<Stush> What if you're in your artificial navi body?
<Stush> Is breaking up in your avatar alright?
<@YoungFriday> Stush no
<Stush> Okay.
<Stush> But the air is poisonous!
* @YoungFriday breaks up with Stush over some MMO
<@YoungFriday> I'm sorry, Stush, we can't be /together.
<@OfficeCait> /divorce
<Stush> First you steal my loot, and then you break my heart.
<Stush> Can i still use your town portals, Friday?
<@YoungFriday> hahahahaha
<Yeoz>
http://www.civilization5.com/img/screen ... hot_02.jpg :D
<+BongoBill> The best thing so far about the Civilization 5 announcement is all the hex jokes.
<+BongoBill> People are hexcited. The game's got a lot of hex appeal. And it was a good decision: after all, hex sells.
<+drethelin> when I heard there was hex again I was all FF
<LapCait|CLASS> Better than letting them get all pent-up.
<JDigital> Groan.
<+BongoBill> I love you both.
<JDigital> Math jokes, Cait. You're such a square.
<+BongoBill> You'll have to tri harder than that, JD.
<JDigital> Hex harder. There's a river.
<+Ridley> I love the three GIANT HORSES next to the city
<JDigital> six ther'es a river
<+drethelin> that's how civ's always been
<+Ridley> shut up.
<+Ridley> to JD.
<+Ridley> Yeah, I know
<+BongoBill> dreth: now it's less so.
<JDigital> I oct to shut up now
<+Ridley> i'll deca you if you don't.
<JDigital> well hexcuuuse me princess
<@Squizzle> Fuck you. Nine.
<LaserBeing> also the best part
<LaserBeing> of any Zelda episode
<LaserBeing> is when Zelda is sitting on her bed or something
<LaserBeing> and Link comes in
<LaserBeing> and goes "ALL RIGHT!
SMOOCHIN' TIME"
<LaserBeing> and fucking tries to jump on her
<Nerd> haha
<@Friday> YES
<@Friday> I remember that
<@Romosome> yes
<LaserBeing> and she dodges
<@Romosome> this was before we had a concept of sexual harassment
<@Friday> fucking laughed out loud
<@Friday> I admit it
<@Romosome> bitches was just playin' hard to get
<@Friday> just like
<@Friday> no preamble
<@Friday> just
<@Romosome> SHE'S JUST SO FEISTY
<LaserBeing> yeah
<@Friday> ZELDA ON BED?
<@Romosome> RAWR
<@Friday>
TIME TO SEX<LaserBeing> and takes a fucking flying leap
<@Romosome> Link just whips it out and it makes the sword-beam sound effect
frocto: but I pretty much lost faith in dick measuring when I found out how big roger's was
Brentai: Mine is tiny.
Brentai: So tiny.
Brentai: Itty bitty.
Brentai: Teeny.
Brentai: Weent.
Brentai: So small.
frocto: and yet you're a stone cold badass
Brentai: All the testosterone went to my AWESOME gland.
frocto: so yeah, penis size has basically nothing to do with awesomeness
frocto: more like your lying gland
Brentai: My lying gland is enormous. And throbbing.
frocto: veiny
frocto: constantly unloading all over women's faces
frocto: there's a series of japanese pornos just about you lying to women
frocto: ok bye
<+Kazz> Furries thrive in the dark, damp corners of the internet
<+Kazz> In fact, they make them damper.
<@JDigital> My headphones broke, but I really wanted to play tf2
<@JDigital> so I held them on my head with a pair of underpants
<@Friday> Roger
<@Friday> You're getting dominated by Bart in a dress
<@Friday> 0-6
<@Friday> Go vote for yourself or something
<Brentai> ...
<Brentai> fap
<JDigital> All settlers were offered an acre of land wherever they wanted, so Drain took a long thin strip on both sides of a major river
<@Squizzle> Two strips, you mean.
<+Aoko> (12:44:54 AM) Brentai: Oh damn it you have multiple AIM nicks too.
<+Aoko> (12:45:07 AM) WAHA!: I think at last count there was 200
<+Aoko> (12:45:10 AM) WAHA!: but I lost the pw for most
<+Aoko> (12:45:20 AM) Brentai: You are terrible.
<+Aoko> (12:45:27 AM) Offering to send HK.rar to Brentai
<+Aoko> (12:45:28 AM) Brentai: A terrible human person.
<+Aoko> (12:45:30 AM) WAHA!: why
<+Aoko> (12:45:45 AM) Brentai: AIMing you is like an Easter Egg hunt.
<+Aoko> (12:45:48 AM) Brentai: Through a pile of moe.
<+Aoko> (12:46:03 AM) WAHA!: so moe~
<+Aoko> I laughed. :(
<Brentai> Hey I didn't get any message about that file.
<Brentai> TRILLIAAAAAAN
<@Romosome> every so often Lyrai will change nicks to a character I find sexually attractive and when I first see it I'll be like WHOA HEY before realizing it's her and stopping myself out of self-preservation
<JD> moe moe
<Brentai> Okay that did it.
<@Romosome> Saturn yeah
<+Ridley> I miss the days when everyone I knew just quietly had an FTP server on their system and used those for file transfers
* Brentai is now known as Rukia-chan
<Rukia-chan> You are now confused and aroused.
* @Romosome squints
<Rukia-chan> YOU FOOL.
* Rukia-chan kicks Romosome in the face.
<@Romosome> it's just like charlie brown/my childhood!
* Aoko is now known as Arcueid
<@Romosome> if you guys turn this into a contest it's going to get fucking weird really fast
<Rukia-chan> I uh, I don't know what Romosome's other tastes are.
<Rukia-chan> I'll just go with my own I guess.
* Rukia-chan is now known as Angelica_Pickles
<Angelica_Pickles> I MEAN WAIT NO
* Angelica_Pickles is now known as Mary-Kate_Olsen
<Mary-Kate_Olsen> FUCK
* Mary-Kate_Olsen is now known as Mrs_Crabapple
<Mrs_Crabapple> TURN IT OOOOOOOFFF
* Mrs_Crabapple is now known as Chu-Chu
* Chu-Chu is now known as JessieFromToyStory
[4:21] <zara> there will be dlc
[4:21] <zara> with extra things to stab
[4:21] <aintaer> meats
[4:21] <aintaer> walls
[4:21] <aintaer> candles
[4:22] <zara> you stabbed 100 objects
[4:22] <zara> you a master stabber
[4:22] <aintaer> You have gone 10 minutes without stabbing something
[4:22] <aintaer> Congratulations on your Stabbatical
<+Kazz> shit i don't know where i am
<@Friday> Kazz, check to see if you're still at your computer, in your room.
<+Kazz> ok
<@Friday> I sometimes get confused, too.
<+Kazz> yes
<+Kazz> here's my wax statue of friday
<@Friday> shit
<+Kazz> here's my pile of used tissues
<+Kazz> i must be home
* @Friday sighs heavily
<@Friday> I'm lost
<@Friday> Oh here we go
<@Friday> Hey guys
<@Friday> I'm playing diablo
<Brentai> > YOU ARE IN KAZZ'S ROOM. A PUNGENT AROMA HITS YOU LIKE A HUGE MASSIVE 800 POUND GORILLA WITH ITS BLACK MONKEY DICK THROBBING RIGHT IN THE OPEN.
<@Friday> > inven
<Brentai> YOU ARE HOLDING: A CAPTAIN CONDOM, NO SENSE OF SELF RESPECT
<@Friday> > Drop no sense of self respect
<Brentai> YOU NOW HAVE NO NO SENSE OF SELF RESPECT
<@Friday> > weild condom
<Brentai> YOU WELD THE CONDOM TO YOUR NIPPLES
<@Friday> > log onto IRC
<Brentai> > YOU ARE IN #FINALFIGHT. A PUNGENT AROMA HITS YOU LIKE A HUGE MASSIVE 800 POUND GORILLA WITH ITS BLACK MONKEY DICK THROBBING RIGHT IN THE OPEN.
* notKazz (
zibabh@cpe-76-179-236-105.maine.res.rr.com) has joined #finalfight
<Brentai> > NOTKAZZ HAS JOINED #FINALFIGHT. A PUNGENT AROMA HITS YOU LIKE A HUGE MASSIVE 800 POUND GORILLA WITH ITS BLACK MONKEY DICK THROBBING RIGHT IN THE OPEN.
(12:37:10 PM) BongoBill: I think this week I'll replace all commercial breaks with "Good Idea, Bad Idea" segments.
(12:37:19 PM) laserbeing: good idea
(12:37:20 PM) Lyrai: <+Ridley> the guys I knew with asperger's talked about their furry naruto/starcraft slash fanfiction.
(12:37:20 PM) Lyrai: {Friday, August 27th, 2010 11:53:36am Fa'Diel} <MetalSlime> You're lucky Lyrai doesn't appear to be here
(12:37:20 PM) Lyrai: {Friday, August 27th, 2010 11:53:46am Fa'Diel} <MetalSlime> or that fanfiction would be reproduced
(12:37:23 PM) Ridley: bad idea
(12:37:23 PM) Lyrai: !!!!!!!!!!
(12:37:27 PM) mode (+v Lyrai) by ChanServ
<MarsDragon> Hey, in P3P....I'm just starting October. I've polished off a bunch of S-Links, and right now biggest priority is Star. I haven't started Hanged Man at all, but it seems the ultimate there is a requirement for Mara. Is it worth it to ignore all potential girlfriends to hang out with a little girl so I can get in touch with my inner giant dick?
<Lottel> little girl... touch... my... giant... dick