CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

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Mongrel
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CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Tue Jan 21, 2014 1:50 pm

[14:26] <khf> something something quack fayden something something mighty dacks
[14:26] <@Seeker> nightveil specter gives quantum devotion
[14:26] <@Seeker> something something quark fayden
[14:27] <prolops> omg the mighty dacks
[14:27] <prolops> darkwing dack
[14:27] <prolops> i am the night
[14:28] <khf> life is like a hurricane
[14:28] <khf> here in
[14:28] <khf> dackburg
[14:28] <prolops> i assume someone already got DACK.. to the future
[14:29] <khf> race cards, lasers, aeroplanes, it's a dack blur
[14:29] <khf> might solve a mystery, or rewrite history
[14:29] <@Seeker> dack tales, whoo ooh
[14:29] <khf> dack tales oo
[14:29] <khf> hi5
[14:29] <@Seeker> :D
[14:30] <khf> could you imagine if we got hold of wotc's ip
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Re: CHAT DUMP (Also quotes and stuff)

Postby Mongrel » Mon Jan 27, 2014 7:29 pm

<greeperpeeper> I do not advise hunting deer in a chevy sonic
<greeperpeeper> while I did manage to kill it the collateral damage was not worth it
<KingRamz> Don't blame you for trying though
<KingRamz> it's how Sonic the Hedgehog kills things so why wouldn't it be how the Chevy Sonic kills things?
<bosshoggatog> no, the deer was in the chevy sonic
<glocks4interns> How he got in my Chevy Sonic I shall never know.
<artifical> @g4i: ROBOTNIK!
<Slearch> I am glad that you did not die in a car accident.
<Basilisk> Buy a Chevy 3 & Knuckles next
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Fri Jan 31, 2014 10:34 pm

"I can't ruin Alabama. We're already 48th in the country at everything, and Mississippi and Arkansas aren't going anywhere." - Charles Barkley, during his gubernatorial run.
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Thu Feb 13, 2014 12:50 am

[Lion King blah blah blah]
<Fry Guy> In a lion family, the dominant adult male fathers all the kids, and if another adult male takes over, they kill all the previous kids to put the female lions in heat
<Fry Guy> so Nala has to be Mufasa's kid and is thus a princess
<QED2> and thus was simba's half-sister
<QED2> or more
<Fry Guy> Well, obviously
<Dantes> So from this we can conclude that Scar is likely a eunuch since Nala was alive at all.
<Fry Guy> There's a song that got cut and eventually ended up in the musical about him talking to the helper bird guy and finally realizing he needs to mate start banging.
<Fry Guy> Him hitting on her is why Nala runs off and finds Simba.
<Dantes> He had to go talk to the guy with the cloaca to figure out what to do with his penis?
<Dantes> Man, Scar was really incompetent.
<Fry Guy> He /somehow caused a drought/.
<Fry Guy> I don't even know how that's /possible/ as a lion.
<Fry Guy> Yes, he's incredibly incompetent.
<artificial> he at least warned them to be prepared
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mothra » Mon Feb 17, 2014 1:22 am

<yeoz> !scenechange
<Utsuho> *************************************************************************
<Utsuho> *************************SCENE CHANGE************************************
<Utsuho> *************************************************************************
<Mothra> !manlyname
<Utsuho> GRIMMJOW SHITLARGE

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Smiler » Sat Mar 01, 2014 10:41 am

I watched an episode of the Australian game show Millionaire Hotseat the other day and one of the questions was "what is the name of the latest version of Microsoft's 'Xbox' video game console?" Of the 4 answer choices, two were "Xbox One" and "Xbox 360"; I can't remember the other two.

Contestant: "Well I'm not 100% sure to be honest, but my son has an Xbox 360 and I know there was another Xbox before that which must have been Xbox One, so I'll lock in Xbox 360."

After finding out they were wrong, the contestant says,
"Why would they call the new Xbox the Xbox One?"

Daily reminder that they called the third Xbox the Xbox One.

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Smiler » Sat Mar 01, 2014 10:48 am

[08:40] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> Neat. The US Air Force is the largest air force in the world.
[08:40] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> The second-largest air force in the world is...
[08:40] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> ...In the US Navy.
[08:42] <JDigital> It turns out a navy isn't much use when most of its targets are further inland
[08:43] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> But we could fuck the shit out of an island nation.
[08:43] <Stush> Ships have pretty huge ranges, though!
[08:43] <Stush> With cruise missiles and stuff
[08:43] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> So stay on best behavior, Irish.
[08:44] <Sede> Third largest air force is Avengers
[08:44] <Sede> sometimes
[08:45] <projections_of_horse_anus_love> Thord largest.
[08:45] <Sede> mm, yes.

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Smiler » Sun Mar 02, 2014 12:39 pm

[10:27] <@Silversong> tangentially, I am excited for Maleficent
[10:27] <kashan> I'm curious if that movie is going to touch on Seelie vs Unseelie fairie mythology.
[10:28] <kashan> Somebody here linked me to a really interesting analysis of the events in sleeping beauty from the perspective of seelie vs unseelie politics and royal etiquette.
[10:30] <@Silversong> keen
[10:30] <@Silversong> srsly though
[10:30] <@Silversong> you're a king, just buy another damn gold plate
[10:31] <@Silversong> :o
[10:31] * Silversong is now known as Silvershower
[10:31] <kashan> The analysis I read said that the King was purposefully taking sides in fae politics for some reason and that no shit he got his daughter cursed.
[10:32] <@Silvershower> I didn't like the disney version. They were asleep for like half the afternoon.
[10:33] <kashan> It's a weird movie.
[10:33] <brontozara> kashan and that's why you don't meddle in international disputes
[10:34] <kashan> Pretty much.
[10:34] <brontozara> i'm sure it'll be addressed in maleficent hahaha just kidding
[10:34] <brontozara> maleficent will turn out to be evil because she was spurned by a lover
[10:35] <Sede> i'd spurn her. i'd spurn her hard.
[10:36] <brontozara> women only turn evil if men dump7888888/.;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;l
[10:36] <brontozara> cat
[10:36] <brontozara> #################
[10:37] <Sede> gj cat

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Blossom » Sun Mar 02, 2014 1:24 pm

[12:23] <TA> http://i.imgur.com/7lhysDD.jpg aaaaaaaaaa
[12:24] <DaakuShinsei> is that what Scrooge McDuck would look like if he were real?
[12:24] <TA> that is a pug
[12:25] <Astro-Boy> duck don't have teeth
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Lyrai » Sun Mar 09, 2014 6:08 pm

[After a long discussion about Tenchi Muyo]
[03:05:25pm -7] <Hamtramck> ...
[03:05:30pm -7] <Hamtramck> I'm referring to her as IKEA forever now.
[03:05:35pm -7] <Hamtramck> HEY TENCHI
[03:05:36pm -7] <Hamtramck> TENCHI
[03:05:40pm -7] <Hamtramck> BUY MY FURNITURE TENCHI

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Mon Mar 10, 2014 11:05 pm

<DeathSquiggle> my dad was watching brady bunch reruns while I was playing hearthstone, and in the commercial break they showed a commercial for betty white's show.
<DeathSquiggle> And it was old ladies talking about having sex in public, and my dad got really angry.
<DeathSquiggle> And he was like "You know, that's just wrong. They should not be playing that commercial now. all the kids who are watching the brady bunch are going to see it...what. Why are you laughing at me?"
<DeathSquiggle> kids watching the brady bunch. lol.
[time passes]
<DeathSquiggle> he just deleted everything off the tivo and he's upset because now he'll never get to see all the gilligans islands
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Metal Slime » Sun Mar 16, 2014 6:19 am

[06:19] <MetalSlime> if I ever get them all. I am going to make a deck of just murlocks and pirates
[06:19] <+Esperath> yar har deedle dee dee
[06:19] <+Esperath> being a murloc is alright with me
[06:19] <+Esperath> do what you want 'cause MRGLGLGLGLGLL lives free
[06:19] <+Esperath> you are a murloc

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Fri Mar 21, 2014 7:36 pm

Doug wrote:It's fun to tell the new guy on the submarine that we're going to pick up a mail buoy, and to dress him up in heavy foul weather gear, with a life preserver, and then send him to the captain to tell the captain that he's ready to go topside

Doug wrote:The captain of the submarine that I was on was notorious for screwing with the new officers.

- The captain sent the pregnant wife of one of the other officers, along with two MPs, to greet a new officer getting off of the plane at the airport. When he appeared, she yelled, "That's him," and the MPs acted like they were going to detain him

- The captain had my buddy Dave, an enlisted man, switch clothes with the captain himself, and greet the new engineer officer as he came aboard. The engineer was confused, because Dave was clearly much too young to be captain, and said, "Uh, are you the XO?" (The executive officer, second in command.) Dave, perfect actor, testily says "I'm the captain!" and wheels around and storms off with the captain watching from nearby dressed as an enlisted man
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Esperath » Tue Mar 25, 2014 7:10 pm

16:08 <Silversong>: Just got back from the first of three events this week, and was reminded it's 9 days till an anime con that I'm running a lolita panel at, and I haven't finished my powerpoint yet
16:10 <Silversong>: maybe instead of a presentation, I'll just randomly generate haiku for an hour.
16:10 <Silversong>: !haiku
16:10 <Upth>: Haiku Novicework: within these four walls / I'm the hero here, you bitch / give me compliments
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Wed Mar 26, 2014 7:45 pm

Genuine question overheard at work:

"Is it steeped tea, or seeped tea?"
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:51 am

<Grak> It's weird that I remember this about Robocop.
<Grak> But like, you would walk through the steps like a dozen times before finally going up them.
<Grak> I found a picture to illustrate!
<Grak> https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/imag ... UTjmlthD4Y
<Grak> See, you can walk THROUGH those steps, or you can go up them.
<Grak> To go up them, you had to push the angle to go up.
<Grak> And if the game didn't detect that you were pushing the angle, you walked right through hem.
<Grak> Then had to walk back and try again.
<Grak> And you could easily do this 3-4 times before getting it to work.
<Grak> And if you pushed up too far, you stopped walking entirely.
<Grak> You had to get it PERFECTLY angled.
<Grak> D-pads back then were not great for this.
<Slearch> that screenshot except replace robocop with a ninja turtle
<Doug> Pfft, that's no Bad Dudes
<Ashenai> UNDERWATER BOMB DEFUSING :RAGE:
<Grak> Hahhaha I had forgotten that ninja turtles game even existed.
<Grak> I hated underwater levels SOO MUCH
<Slearch> kinda crazy, we didn't know it back then, but having played those crazy hard games is now a badge of honor
<Grak> I didn't even consider them that hard back then... they were just, you know, video games.
<Grak> That's how video games were.
<Grak> If they weren't hard, you blew through them in like an hour.
<Slearch> obviously
<Grant> Or you were forced to run around the countryside fighting slimes to level up
<Grak> Those fucking silver slime piece of shit motherfuckers... oh sure you run away... you fucking cock sucker...
<Ashenai> Growing up, I played Nintendo games with my neighbor, a little Polish girl.
<Ashenai> She would pray to Jesus to help us every time we got stuck on a level.
<Ashenai> When we were trying to get through TMNT, I think we may have technically qualified as a monastery.
<Doug> There should be a video game where you literally push a button to have Jesus appear and do something
<FryGuy> Like when you start masturbating he shows up and scolds you?
<Doug> No, man, he's like a smart bomb, he smites the enemies or something but you have to progress farther to earn more Jesuses
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Lyrai » Fri Mar 28, 2014 3:36 am

I don't know who the fuck those people are, I don't know why that's funny, and I don't think anyone in there is on the boards so why are you posting that and eveyrhting else with these weird unfunny people.

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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Fri Mar 28, 2014 10:33 am

That is a bizarrely angry reply.

I didn't realize this was some kind of BRONTOCHATS ONLY thread and I thought the story of Ashenai's neighbour was pretty funny and adorable.

Seriously, that's kind of a bullshit response, Lyrai.
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Esperath » Fri Mar 28, 2014 6:26 pm

There's a reason the previous thread was called #finalfight quotes; most of these quotes aren't on bash because they're not funny out of community context. When you don't know the community, they're just not relevant.
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Re: CHAT DUMP (and Quotes)

Postby Mongrel » Fri Mar 28, 2014 7:26 pm

The previous thread was also just called "Quotes" - note the title of this thread that I created myself. If the membership didn't want a combined thread, maybe someone should have said something at some point in the past two months, or on one of the seven prior occasions I posted in this thread instead of getting ambush-snippy with me just because you guys think I posted an unfunny chatlog.

As for the humour, I don't know the people involved well at all and I thought it was funny. I probably left too much padding on it, but I don't think any of these responses are justified or proportionate.


You know what, it's fine, never mind.

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