Mongrel wrote:
- nosimpleway
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Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
"Jesus wasn't a socialist!"
"Well, sure, he never advocated for a government or economic system to redistribute wealth because he taught that people should feel compelled to share simply because it's the right thing to do, it sh--"
"BECAUSE HE WAS A VENTURE CAPITALIST."
[dawning, mute horror]
"Well, sure, he never advocated for a government or economic system to redistribute wealth because he taught that people should feel compelled to share simply because it's the right thing to do, it sh--"
"BECAUSE HE WAS A VENTURE CAPITALIST."
[dawning, mute horror]
Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
the REAL joke is, the one time Jesus completely lost his shit and flipped the fuck out and whipped people was over money.



Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
Everyone always likes to point out that his flipping out was because they were doing money shit in a church, but it's not like Jesus didn't just constantly fucking shit on the rich otherwise. Dude could not go 10 minutes without talking about how rich people were getting denied heaven for being a bunch of bastards.



- nosimpleway
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Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
"If you guys ever write down all this stuff I'm saying, I want everybody to make sure to include that part: rich people don't go to heaven. I mean it. Is that the doctor over there? Get him to write it down too. It's important."
Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
I'm legitimately starting to wonder: was I the only one who grew up hearing that Money is the Root of All Evil? Or is that just a thing weird ex-hippie light misanthropes with too many cats teach their kids?


- nosimpleway
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Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
It's 1 Timothy 6:10.
There's all sorts of shitty justifications these people regurgitate when confronted with the very, very clear Biblical message that greed is bad, though.
There's all sorts of shitty justifications these people regurgitate when confronted with the very, very clear Biblical message that greed is bad, though.
- Mongrel
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Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
Friday wrote:Everyone always likes to point out that his flipping out was because they were doing money shit in a church, but it's not like Jesus didn't just constantly fucking shit on the rich otherwise. Dude could not go 10 minutes without talking about how rich people were getting denied heaven for being a bunch of bastards.
Tommy Douglas, the leader of our first mainstream socialist party (the CCF, precursor to the NDP), was one of those folksy prairie ministers with a bottomless store of down-home wisdom and compassion. One quote from him I recall often is "The Bible is like a Bull Fiddle; you can make it play any tune you like."
It amuses me that the only way right-wing trash can make that work is by outright lying about what the bible says.

- Mongrel
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Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
i, too, remember the part of the bible where Our Lord And Savior Jesus Christ stepped into the temple & saw the money changers & said "this is good to me, lmao."
render unto ceasar what is caesar's, except if it's 70% off, because those bargains are godlike

Re: Inspirational tales of Glorious Unfettered Capitalism
"Well hey, it turns out you can serve God and Mammon at the same time! Who knew?"