The New Imagedump Thread

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Mongrel
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Sat Nov 13, 2021 1:05 pm

Absolutely incredible
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mharr
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby mharr » Sat Nov 13, 2021 3:08 pm

I don't know the historical context of that but I'd bet a limb they're writing a hilarious comeback to some asshole.

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Sat Nov 13, 2021 6:46 pm

mharr wrote:I don't know the historical context of that but I'd bet a limb they're writing a hilarious comeback to some asshole.

YEP.

Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks

According to the story, the Zaporozhian Cossacks (from "beyond the rapids", Ukrainian: za porohamy), inhabiting the lands around the lower Dnieper River in Ukraine, had defeated Ottoman Empire forces in battle. However, Mehmed demanded that the Cossacks submit to Ottoman rule. The Cossacks, led by Ivan Sirko, replied in a characteristic manner; they wrote a letter, replete with insults and profanities. The painting exhibits the Cossacks' pleasure at striving to come up with ever more base vulgarities.
Mehmed IV, Ottoman Sultan 1648–1687

Sultan Mehmed IV to the Zaporozhian Cossacks: As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the sun and moon; grandson and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God Himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians – I command you, the Zaporogian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks.
— Turkish Sultan Mehmed IV

The Cossacks' reply came as a stream of invective and vulgar rhymes:

Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons. We have no fear of your army; by land and by sea we will battle with thee. Fuck thy mother.

Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow. Screw thine own mother!

So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord. The day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!
— Koshovyi otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host


"You said 'fuck your mom' twice."
"I like fucking your mom! Ha!"
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Büge » Sun Nov 14, 2021 10:12 am

here, have the Twelfth Doctor reading it

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby beatbandito » Sat Nov 20, 2021 8:27 am

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby beatbandito » Sat Nov 20, 2021 12:54 pm

we b double postin

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Sat Nov 20, 2021 2:14 pm

Was that photo taken in someone's closet?
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Sat Nov 20, 2021 6:51 pm

[derp]
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mharr
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby mharr » Sat Nov 27, 2021 6:47 pm

beatbandito wrote:we b double postin

Fucking wait a second.

Somebody tell me that's not supposed to be Ed.

...

This isn't an adaptation it's a fucking hit job. Someone was paid to remove the property from all possible future media.

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Sat Nov 27, 2021 6:55 pm

Wait, which one came first though?
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby beatbandito » Sat Nov 27, 2021 7:47 pm

fun fact: that is not a real gameboy ad
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby mharr » Sat Nov 27, 2021 9:31 pm

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Thad » Mon Nov 29, 2021 2:59 pm

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Wed Dec 01, 2021 3:16 am

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Friday » Wed Dec 01, 2021 5:08 am

I've seen that fucking image so many times by now that at first I was like "why is Mongrel posting this, it's not a response to the post above, so is he -- oh."
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Wed Dec 01, 2021 10:31 am

It was the first time *I* saw it. ;____;
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Thu Dec 02, 2021 6:59 pm

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby François » Thu Dec 02, 2021 11:04 pm

I refuse to believe Cloud is taller than Abe. My brain will not accept it.

...

Yeah Cloud is 5'8" and while Abraham's height has apparently not been established he is about as tall as Homer who is 6'.

...

I guess that's what I care about nowadays.

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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Friday » Fri Dec 03, 2021 3:54 am

It was the first time *I* saw it. ;____;


I mean the original image. Not the one with Cloud shopped in it.

Thad alone has linked that image like 10 times over the years. Again, not the one with Cloud in it. The original. With the cloud in it.
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Re: The New Imagedump Thread

Postby Mongrel » Fri Dec 03, 2021 3:56 am

oh lmao xD
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