Keep Wishing You Were Me, and I'll Keep Making You Have To. Let's Play Cassette Beasts!

[nosimpleway]

???: BUT SOMEONE OF YOUR POTENTIAL COULD DO A LITTLE BETTER, DON'T YOU THINK?


Slurp! Into the thing's weird mirror-head-portal-whatever the Nowhere Monarch goes.

???: HMM. SOME HUMANS GOT IN HERE. RUN ALONG NOW, WILL YOU?


And off he goes.

Meredith: Uh... I realize that this was a really trivial thing to come all this way for. And a really stupid thing to nearly die over. You didn't have to do this. Thanks mate.

As I was saying to Nowhere Monarch, you came here hoping it would have some shred of a connection to your former life. Having that kind of feeling isn't trivial. And to your second point, I was going to want to beat up Nowhere Monarch sooner or later for my own reasons, so this saved me the time of figuring out how to get in here and do that. And it's not like we were in any danger of dying, really, Nowhere Monarch was an easier fight than Poppetox.

Meredith: I think... I've had enough of abandoned malls and mortal peril for today. C'mon, let's go back to town and check this record out.


Music: Wherever We Are Now, lyrical version
An establishing shot of Gramophone Cafe that isn't at our regular table! Wow!
Meredith: So... The whole... Fusion thing... I felt like we should, uh, talk about it?
Prompt: "It's pretty weird, right?" / "It's pretty cool, right?"
Meredith: It's certainly... something. It's like our minds merge, and I am no longer me. Afterwards, whilst I can remember it, it doesn't feel like it's something that I experienced. It's like remembering a dream. Maybe our brains just aren't equipped to process it...
Had you, uh, fused with anyone before? N-not that it's a brobdingnagian deal if you have! I just wasn't sure if that was your first time. This is... coming out all wrong. Forget I said anything.

Please tell me not everyone is going to have this awkward "does this remind you of anything" conversation after I fuse with them for the first time, because I already think Eugene is kind of a weenie.

Meredith: I've been meaning to ask... What makes you so sure that you have a way to return home?
Prompt: "I had a vision..."
Meredith: Uh, you're gonna have to tell me the full story here, mate.

Meredith: ...Huh. That's pretty wild. I'll uphold my end of the bargain. You helped me find a record, I'll help you find a way off New Wirral. Oh! I almost forgot about the record!

Music: My House
Meredith: ...
This is pretty good. I mean, it's not the same as the album I used to have, but it's familiar enough.
I, uh, I spent my teen years being very miserable, and bad with people. When I went to college, I wanted to change, for real. The record was kind of the soundtrack to me, like, trying to change and get better. Not that I did. I almost made lifelong friends, but they don't speak to me anymore.

Didn't speak to you before you got sucked into a different universe and cut off all contact with your previous liI'm not helping, am I.

Meredith: I know it's me who's the problem, but I want to keep trying. Maybe that's what that Archangel meant. Maybe I've spent too much time distracting myself with stuff instead of trying to actually live.

I dunno, I know lots of people IRL life who completely define who they are based on the media they consume. It's tedious to anyone who doesn't also consume that media, but it means they have friends they can talk about their favorite things with. So you just need to find someone on New Wirral who also likes The Witch HouI'm still not helping.

Meredith: But even if we didn't find exactly what I was looking for, I'm... OK with this outcome.
You didn't need to risk your life to help me. A lot sucks about New Wirral, but... You're kinda cool.


That ringing endorsement represents a budding friendship with Meredith, allowing us to fuse anytime the meter is full from here on out.

Meredith: This isn't the first time that triangle bloke has appeared to nab an Archangel, is it? That doesn't seem good...
Did you say something earlier about some lead you wanted to follow up on? "For that is where my chambers lie, halls now empty and alone"? Yeah, uh, I don't know what that means.

It means the final dungeon Morgante is pointing me toward is deserted, no people or monsters inside, like at all, just a straight walk from start to finish.

Meredith: Uh, I guess we better get back to adventuring. Didn't you hear some rumours about something happening in New London? That might be the place to check out.

One of the Captains is there. I guess the game just rifles through whatever rumors the player has active and goes "Hey why not look at that one" at random.


Skelevangelist is ready to grow up.


#094 Kingrave, the "giant 'king' chess piece"
"The Kingrave's body is made of a dense, malleable stone, painted in ornate colors. It moves very slowly, dragging its fur cape along the ground as it slides."
If I wanted a monster with really high Speed and low everything else, Bulletino and Arkidd are already right there. I go for Melee Attack, and Kingrave delivers. It already picked up Last Rites from its stint as Skelevangelist, so it's ready to go bust some heads.
Kingrave doesn't have any unqiue moves but it follows the general theme of being a king of the dead. Delegate lets it transfer all its statuses, for good or ill, to its partner. Vengeful Curse hits any monster that KOs Kingrave with three random status ailments. Retribution raises Kingrave's Melee and Ranged Attack automatically whenever its partner is knocked out.


Meredith's quest is done and Kayleigh's isn't, so back in the party Kayleigh goes. Maybe I'll go handle Mourningtown next, haven't decided.

Before I wrap the update, I return the Elfless to Hoylake.
Hoylake: I must congratulate you on your abilities. Why, at this rate, I feel I am the assistant and YOU are the scientist! The truth is, I'm not actually a professor or a scientist.

Yeah, Meredith told me.

Hoylake: Before I washed ashore on New Wirral, I was a corporate salaryman. I am less a patron of science and more a patron of science fiction. Even still, I must remain rational! Coming here has given my life a new purpose. I may not be a real professor, but I believe my efforts here can still be valuable!
Thank you for your unrelenting assistance to the scientific cause, my friend. You set an example for us all!

This completes "On the Hunt", and Hoylake stops asking for specific species. He's more interested now in how many monsters I've indexed, total. For the 42 monsters I've gotten so far, he hands over 20 Fused Materials, three Upgrapes, and a bunch of type-specific tapes all at once.


I go to Wilma to turn my Fused Materials into microphone upgrades, only to discover a few new upgrades. For ten Fused Materials I can get a Bulletino Cartridge Shard. I said when I got the Bulletino Dash that running into an encounter with it would deal a little bit of fire-type damage to monsters in that encounter, but then discovered that didn't actually work. The Bulletino Cartridge Shard is the missing piece, so now I can do that.
For ten more Fused Materials I can also buy a Boltam Fur. If I run into a random encounter with Electromagnetism active, I start the battle with an extra AP.
But now I'm out of Fused Materials without getting the next mic upgrade. Oh well.

[nosimpleway]

Wherever I Am Now:

Main Quests:
Land of Confusion: Locate Archangels to complete Morgante's song, then follow the clues it contains to find your way home. Collected 2/8 song parts.
Take Me On: Train with each of the ranger captains to become a ranger. Trained with 1/12 captains.
Acting On Your Best Behavior: Meet up with Eugene in the Outskirts.
I Ran So Far Away: Bring Kayleigh to Mourningtown.

Side Quests:
Coin-Operated: A coin-operated android in Eastham Woods appears to be malfunctioning. Perhaps finding a suitable coin will help restore it to life.

Rumours:
Eugene: "I saw Eugene hanging out near a strange building outside of town. What is he doing out there?" (Points to Acting On Your Best Behavior.)
Captain Zedd: "Last I heard, Captain Zedd was heading out to see what's up with Mourningtown in the East. I bet he fell asleep on the way..."
Captain Lodestein: "Have you been to Ham before? You know, that little valley west of Eastham Woods where Captain Lodestein hangs out?"
Captain Penny Dreadful: "I heard Captain Penny Dreadful can often be found in the ruined village east of here."
Metal Woman: "I heard there's a metal woman up in Eastham Woods. Have you met her?" (points to Coin-Operated)
Captain Buffy: "Captain Buffy's my favorite. She works out in Cherry Meadow, you know?"
Cherry Meadow: "You probably won't believe me, but I saw a tiny little Dominoth in the clearing in the center of Cherry Meadow. It wasn't just a baby, it was small enough to fit in my hand! How do you think it got like that? Something strange is going on over there..."
Ruin: "Supposedly there's an old ruin that appeared in Cherry Meadow recently. Sounds pretty strange, doesn't it?"
Captain Skip: "You've gotta admire the resourcefulness of Captain Skip. They're usually at the mouth of the river west of Harbourtown."
Captain Judas: "I heard the famed survivalist, Captain Judas is camping out on an island in the southeast. I know he'd probably hate me just for relying on modern conveniences, but... He's just so hot!"

Type Interactions Thus Far:
Air: Uproots grass (AP Drain), Extinguishes fire (Melee/Ranged attack down), Energizes astral (AP Boost)
Astral: Drains fire, water, earth, air (AP Drain), Energizes astral (AP Boost)
Earth: Energizes astral (AP Boost)
Fire: Updrafts air (free wall), Energizes astral (AP Boost), Melts ice (Water coating), Melts plastic (poison coating), Ignites poison (Burn)
Ice: Chills air (Accuracy down), Conducts lightning (Multitarget)
Lightning: Electrifies ice and water (Conductive, extra lightning damage whenever a lightning move is used), Insulates plastic (electric-type contact damage)
Metal: Disturbs astral (Berserk)
Plant: Seeds earth (Leeched)
Plastic: Distracts astral (AP Drain), Smokes fire (Evasion Up), Insulates lightning (Unitarget)
Poison: Disturbs astral (Berserk)
Water: Conducts lightning (Multitarget)

[nosimpleway]

Episode 6: Pride You Took, Pride You Feel


Music: Like Chimeras
Rogue Fusions constantly respawn, in preset points. If one happens to spawn here in the outskirts, it will flood the basin it's in with water, or whatever this stuff is.


Carni-whatnow?


Never seen one of those before.


#??? Fragliacci, the "clown with a cannon head"
"The Fragliacci's whole body is something akin to a ballistic cannon - its 'face' is merely a cover to the cannon's barrel, which is able to fire objects with a terrifying velocity."
There are... nine? If I'm counting right? new monster lines released in the 1.5 patch that came out last October. Before this thread the last time I'd played was in July. This one's new to me. (And yeah, the ingame index lists its number as "???". Just count up from the last one, guys, my daughter can do that.) Judging from its fully-developed movelist and its stats, this is a remastered form of something that hasn't spawned anywhere I've been.

I don't have a screencap of its face flipping up to reveal the cannon barrel underneath but it looks like this. Fragliacci's predecessor remasters with the question along the lines of "What is a clown's purpose?" and this is what you get when you answer "To Terrify". So that tracks.
Fragliacci's signature move is "Sticker Trick", hitting the target with the "Booby Trap" status. Booby Trap replaces whatever move the target used last with Booby Trap, which damages the user when selected. I'm not sure if it affects one move at a time or what, since I haven't seen it in action yet, but that's what it's for.
The inspiration: What is the purpose of a clown? To terrify. With an unmoving mask hovering over the barrel of a howitzer.


I head north to the woods where I found Boltam &c. and go west from there, into the Cherry Hills area on the west side of the map. There's another guy here who wants to level-check me, and just like the last time this happened, I'm nearly ten levels past him.
Velocirifle hits five stars at the end of this fight, so that's ready to remaster whenever I can find a campsite.


A chest in the middle of an empty cave is as sure a sign of an incoming Rogue Fusion battle as the shadowy silhouette.


Lightning/Grass turns out to be one of those type combinations that's hard to find an edge over. Triphinx and Decibelle are knocked out quickly. Ramtasm does okay, and Kingrave manages to land a glittery hit that will make things a little simpler. Whatever this thing is made of still knows Hurricane and a variety of lightning-type moves, so it's still rough going.


Fragliacci was a surprise because it was added to the game after I'd stopped playing months ago. Mothmanic was a surprise because I just forgot it existed. With the Fusion un-fused I'm taking lower powered hits and my attacks aren't bouncing off of a ridiculously high defense, so I have the liberty to slow down a moment and throw a tape at the thing.


#032 Mothmanic, the "brobdingnagian creepy moth"
"The Mothmanic's whole body surges with powerful currents of electricity. It can wield this power offensively, and is able to dispense devastating bolts of lightning towards its targets with a beat of its wings."
Comparing the two things that Dominoth can remaster into, Wingloom has a stat total 100 points less than the other option I haven't seen or described yet. And this is why: Wingloom itself can remaster while that other option is the end of the line. One of these days I'll have to sit down and really look at stat totals and spreads for various monsters to do a comparison, but my general assumption about lightning-types is "Even if Cat-5 isn't awesome, it's got a 10% advantage over any other lightning-type in the game as long as Meredith is using it, so why not go get Meredith and Cat-5?"
Which, yes, is also how I feel about air-types and Decibelle, so Dominoth would have been out of luck no matter which way it remastered. Astral-types do not fall under this umbrella because Ramtasm does not get any sort of bonus for being my starter.
The inspiration: Mothmanic seems to have given up any sort of superhero motif in favor of being a moth/lamp hybrid itself. It's named after the cryptid Mothman, and being a man-sized winged creature with red eyes, it fits the initial description if not the popular depicition of the thing.



Elfless stars up to five after this fight. The hint I got way back when told me that Elfless remasters two different ways depending on whether it has Toy Hammer in its movelist, and it gets Toy Hammer for free, so what's the brobdingnagian deal? Well, Elfless starts with two moves, learns five moves as it stars up, and only has six spots available for stickers on its movelist. By the time it learns Toy Hammer, its movelist is full, so the sticker goes into the player's inventory instead of onto the tape.

[nosimpleway]

After the asswhoopin' I got from Blossomawthmanic it's time to go hit up a campfire just to fix my tapes, so...


#043 Artillerex, the "huge lizard with a gun in its belly"
"The body of the Artillerex contains a pit of molten metal, which it can form into shrapnel and shoot out in blasts from the 'turret' on its belly. Its ballistic capabilities and towering stature make it a truly fearsome foe to stand against."
Artillerex gets its unique move as soon as it stars up once: Meteor Barrage is power 20 but hits all enemies two to six times each. Oddly, it's an earth-type move... and is followed up by the beast-type Bite and Beast Wall and Bone Cannon, then the metal-type Shrapnel. Artillerex is fire-type but doesn't learn any fire-type moves (or even typeless moves that would be fire-type when Artillerex uses them) by itself. That's odd.
The inspiration: From a single bullet to a small-dinosaur pistol to a huge-dinosaur Gatling gun.


#068 Faerious, the "sword-wielding elf"
"An Elfless who has channelled their surpressed fury into honing their combat skills. They strike down their foes with swords made of ice, and block incoming blows with a shield made of tree bark."
Its defenses aren't great, but Faerious can still be set up to punish attackers with Sharp Edges and Parry Stance. It's one of the few monsters to get Heroic Sword, an attack power 90 melee hit, and one of even fewer to get Glitter Bomb.
The inspiration: There are a bunch of different kinds of elves throughout folklore, and Elfless remasters from "Santa's assistant" to "Tolkien-style"... with a plastic toy hammer. Not really sure how the hammer factors into things, but there you have it.


This side of the map is called Cherry Hills because of the pink cherry trees. It's spring on the west side and autumn on the east side.


Cherry Hills has fewer gentle slopes than areas I've been, it's built like a labyrinth I have to navigate at ground level before I can climb to the top of the cliffs. There's a little shrine of some sort on the way.


Previously I marked the music with randos as Face Down, but that's only for ranger captain fights. The correct music for playing here is Shot in the Dark.
Socrates and Plato here both pontificate a bit before starting the monster fight.


...excuse me, what?


Hey just for the record I am not okay with this.


excuse me what


Boltam isn't built to take brobdingnagian hits or anything but that took it from full HP to zero, then nearly knocked snalligator out with the blow-through. In one hit. I'd forgotten that Fusion Powers were even a thing, so this was an unpleasant surprise.


Needless to say after an opening salvo like that it is trivial for Galapaw to knock snalligator out entirely.


Thankfully this happens late enough in the fight that Kayleigh can sparkle-wallop the rest of Galapaw's HP away.


When Rogue Fusions are defeated, they split into their component monsters at full health and flinch for a turn. When a human fusion is defeated, it breaks the tapes of its component parts, and neither Socrates nor Plato have a backup. Whew.

[nosimpleway]

Music: Cherry Meadow or Cherry Meadow (night), as appropriate.
Thankfully a campsite is not too far away. It takes 31 wood to build a fire here, but I've accumulated over 1000 so the cost is more trivial now than it was when the Harbourtown Outskirts campsite cost me eight.


I'm more likely to open fights with the Bulletino Dash now. It's a weak hit, but it counts as fire-type for type interactions, and that's enough to set these Twirligigs aflame.


And that's before Random Starter has a chance to proc.


That might be more effective a demonstration if it wasn't against Twirligigs, who are built about the same as Stardigrades are: all defense and HP, crap attack. Desperation deals more damage the lower the user's HP is, and given that this Twirligig is down to minimum HP so I can record it, 40 damage is pathetically low.


#084 Twirligig, the "jumping wooden dummy"
"Twirligigs were once crudely made target practice dummies, but have since gained sentience through unknown means. Lacking any complex limbs, they are forced to move and attack by pivoting on the wooden stakes that run through their bodies."
Those stats, whew. You can tell Twirligig is a gimmick build. As its use of Desperation a moment ago shows, there's virtually now way for Twirligig to take down an opposing monster with regular attacks. It exists almost entirely to use Splinter, a passive move that hits anything that melee-attacks Twirligig. Splinter is only power 15, and while the damage is based off the user's Melee Defense instead of Melee Attack, it's still not going to do much. Twirligig is basically a Magikarp, and won't see much use unless and until it remasters.
The inspiration: It says right there, it's a sapient target-practice dummy.


I dunno, there's no way up the cliff so I can't go look for clues inside or anything.


Bulletino Dash is not always a good idea, since fire-type attacks are not always a good idea.


This is the first I've seen of them, but sometimes puzzles are the "Lights Out" sort. Make all the Magikrabs face the same direction for a prize, but flipping one around will also flip any that are orthagonally adjacent to it.


Granted when there are only two of them it's not difficult to solve, but it's just an introduction to the concept. My reward is a sticker for Wink (debuff's the target's Ranged Attack) and a Ferrichrome Tape (effective at recording metal-types). Easy puzzle, lame reward.


:mystery:

[nosimpleway]

It's a subtle effect, but most parts of New Wirral are visually distinct from one another. It's important for some of the clues given in Morgante's song on how to open the final dungeon. Here I step from the lush green grass of Cherry Hills to the sickly yellow-green grass of The Marshes.


As can be reasonably expected of any video game swamp the monsters are sneaky, devious, dangerous, and venomous.


#002 Hopskin, the "shifty imp in a coat"
"The Hopskin will entice its prey to approach with its unblinking amber eyes and a brobdingnagian smile. However, any creature that is lured in by this charade will by swiftly cut down by the razor sharp claws it conceals beneath a dirty coat."
Choosing the path of the "Vagrant" while remastering a Springheel will result in a Hopskin. Turns out "vagrant" means "creepy gremlin who will stab a bitch without provocation". Huh. Hopskin trades the Springheel's predilection for status and shutdown moves for stronger attacks. It's laser-focused on doing HP damage now.
The inspiration: It's named for and resembles the Hopkinsville Goblins.


I made it to a campsite, but I probably have enough in me for one more Rogue Fusion...


Eh? A three-way fusion? Is that even a thing?
Kayleigh: I'm a little concerned about this...


A mysterious benefactor appears!
Mysterious woman: This country shows no kindness, strangers... Come - let us match these beasts in number!"


Music: Cross Your Heart
Remember I talked about how the Carniviper line and the Nevermort line were both high-speed, status-focused poison-types? And I mentioned that there's only one more common poison-type monster, and it doesn't fit that description? Jellyton is that monster. They're nowhere near as fast as a Carniviper, but much stronger.


That said, I could probably have handled this fight without any help thanks to Random Starter givin' 'em The Old 1-2.


Whatever ballerina sort of thing the mystery woman turned into, it's faster than the Jellytons, and she finishes one off with Icicle Dart.


The Jellytons do the only reasonable thing and try to stop me from killing them so damn fast. It works okay, since I don't have any moves that can type-advantage a poison wall away. Decibelle could have broken both walls with Hurricane if I'd thought about it.


My reward is... some leftover slime. Gee, thanks.

[nosimpleway]

Music: Viola's Theme
Mysterious Woman: ...
You would do well to leave before those fiends return... You surely have no reason to remain in such a place as this.
Kayleigh: At least let us thank you! Who are you?
Mysterious Woman: I am Viola of Messaline. I am no fighter, but this land has thrust such a role upon me. I do not wish to trouble you with my burdens.
Prompt: "What is your burden?" / "Are you on a quest?"

"I'm wrapped up in a love triangle on account of disguising myself as a man. It's complicated."

Viola: ... My brother and I were both cast to the seas. If I have not drowned, perhaps he too came to rest upon these shores...

Oh, right. The other thing.

Viola: I have been searching for some weeks now. A kind soul gifted to me this curious device, with which I may protect myself. If you hear word of my brother Sebastian, my camp is just east from here. Fare the well.


This starts "Everybody's Looking For Something", and the map points me to the westernmost edge of the map to look for clues for Sebastian's whereabouts. I realize I haven't posted a map in a while so have an update.

Oh, and the contents of the chest? A sticker for Poison Coating. Oh well, time to hit that campfire and remaster this Padpole.


#064 Frillypad, the "big-eyed frog creature"
"A Padpole's mature state. The Frillypad's limbs allow it to hunt for food: they can often be found hiding by the edges of ponds and lakes. If someone or something passes by that the Frillypad deems edible, it will attempt to ensnare it with its long tongue."
While Padpole focused largely on learning plant-type moves, Frillypad embraces its own nature and picks up Torrent, Boil, Undertow, and Fog. We already knew that from the Rogue Fusion fight, though.
The inspiration: Padpole was a Nixie of some sort, and Frillypad's description mentions the Kelpie.


A nearby switch opens a dam wall and floods a little basin with water from Thirstaton late. The water doesn't matter so much as removing the wall, as it means I have a shortcut from the lake over to this part of the marsh without having to go through Cherry Hills first.


Further south, I find a little patch of farmland. Tiny farmhouse, couple of beehives, some pumpkins in the field... judging from the name of the person I'm talking to, this must be the much-ballyhooed Piper Farm, source of all the food (and coffee) consumed in Harbourtown.


Edward, nearby, points out that deliveries have been tough to make lately on account of how the bridge is gummed up. That's not an exaggeration, it's covered in goopy slime.


Okay I'll deal with that in a second, I'm gonna steal one of your chickens first.


#100 Cluckabilly, the "giant punk chicken"
"Cluckabillies are defined by their antisocial attitudes. The severity of their angry clucks is so great that they can create small shockwaves."
For the life of me I cannot find anything in Cluckabilly's moveset or stat block noteworthy enough to talk about here. It is what it is.
The inspiration: Oh no did Cassette Beasts pull a Palworld? I can just imagine Scarlet/Violet coming out six months before Cassette Beasts was due to launch and the entire design team going "Well, fuck" when they saw Squawkabilly. Pokemon has parrots with pompadours that are really loud and obnoxious and form street gangs based on the color of their plumage. Cassette Beasts has a roosters with pompadours that are really loud and obnoxious and their plumage looks like a delinquent-style Japanese school uniform. That's... a weird bit of covergent evolution at best, huh?


Okay, back to your goopy slime problem.


Music: Like Chimeras
This is gonna suck.


That... is not going to make this suck any less.


Because, you see, Jellyton has a really high Melee Attack. And Mega Jellyton is two of them stuck together, adding one really high Melee Attack onto another. Even a basic Smack is doing a significant chunk of damage, to say nothing of Toxic Stab.


So when Glittery shenanigans gives Mega Jellyton a fire coating for a few turns, you can bet I swap in something that can hit it with an air attack and debuff that attack power.


This sucks.


That sucked.

[nosimpleway]

Edward Piper thanks me for lowering the bridge, providing another convenient shortcut to places previously explored. He then explains the whole situation: the Pipers use Skelly Jelly to fertilize their crops, and it built up enough in the soil to form a new double-Jellyton.


I've got tons of the stuff since every Jellyton drops some. After I go rest up in Harbourtown, now a short walk away, I come back to take the hint: the pumpkins in the Piper Farm fields can be smeared down with Skelly Jelly.


Not sure where the Nevermort enters into it, if I'm honest.


Let's cut to the chase, shall we?


#089 Jumpkin, the "jumping pumpkin"
"Jumpkins are created when the 'jelly' from a Jellyton is smeared on a regular pumpkin, giving it sentience. The Jumpkin is a curious and friendly being that never seems to stop moving."
Okay so obviously they get both Trick and Treat, like we all saw that one coming, right? Their unique move is Pumpkin Pie, which boosts both its Speed and its AP generation.
The inspiration: A jack-o-lantern, obviously. It's probably worth pointing out that the Bytten Studios logo is a vine-wrapped pumpkin with a wide jack-o-lantern smile, and that Lenna's Inception also had a pumpkin creature that could follow the player around and help fight stuff. Pumpkins are just a thing, I guess. I like Jumpkin's leafy rabbit-ears.


But the purpose behind this entire trip was to get a Jumpkin, because they're the next mobility upgrade. I can katamari myself up walls, now. Ever felt a pumpkin vine? They're quite bristly and pokey, so while it might not be an intuitive first choice for the sort of vine that could cling to a solid surface, it tracks.


Like so.

A nearby trainer fight got Boltam its fifth star, so it's time to remaster. I choose "incredible speed" over "thundering force".


#121 Pinbolt, the "spring-shaped creature with a floating orb head"
"The Pinbolt's metal head floats separately from its body, suspended by a magnetic field generated by the two 'flippers' on its body. It can channel this magnetic field to launch bolts of energy from its singular hand."
Pinbolt gets both Roll Again and Dual Wield, so in addition to being fast by virtue of having a high Speed stat, it's also fast in that it gets extra actions each turn. Roll Again is a 50% chance at the end of each turn to use one of the other moves the user knows, like Random Starter but not at the start. Dual Wield affects the next move on the user's movelist -- whenever that move is chosen, it activates twice. The downside to both Roll Again and Dual Wield is that the extra actions they grant cost their normal AP cost, so Pinbolt is going to need a moveset full of cheap stuff it can easily afford. It learns Headshot, but with a 10 AP cost, when would it ever get to use it?
The inspiration: He stands like a statue, becomes part of the machine. Feeling all the bumpers, always playing clean. He plays by intuition, the digit counters fall. That furry magnetic thing I caught turned into a mean pinball.

[nosimpleway]

Right. Having done all that, it's off to do the second thing I intended to this episode.


This takes me east through the Deadlands and the ruins of New London.


This is where I fought the Djinnviper before, so there are wild Djinn Entonics about. But I already have one of those, so I'm more interested in the other monster.


#057 Sanzatime, the "broken hourglass with a hand"
"The 'core' of the Sanzatimes appears to be their broken hourglass 'heads'. Any sand separated from the central mass will become entirely inanimate. Conversely, the Sanzatime can grow in mass by mking contact with sand."
Not surprisingly, Sanzatime comes with a bunch of moves that mess with the timers on status effects. Sandstorm reduces all durations on all its targets, Dog Years increases those durations, Crumble ignores the duration on walls and destroys them anyway. It's kind of strange that the time-control monster has a positively lethargic base Speed. It moves more like Sansundertale, ya know?
The inspiration: An hourglass with moves that let it control time. I dunno, something about it just doesn't sit right with me, but I can't pinpoint what it is, or any ideas to improve the design.


Eugene is right over there on top of that hill. "Landkeepers" are those pale folks he's got a bug up his ass about.



There's a battle between the two quotes but I stomp this Landkeeper hard enough that I didn't screencap any of it. But hey, here's the dialog that pretty well encapsulates what they're all about. I can't go into the building, it's locked.


But I'm not here to start Eugene's quest, still. I'm here to climb up the central mountain in Autumn Hills and handle Kayleigh's whole thing going on. And that Rogue Fusion over there, I guess.

[nosimpleway]

There's... a station here? Theoretically, at least, all that I can see is the fast-travel point.


I looped around the back of the palisade to see if there was anything back there, and Kayleigh got stuck on some part of the landscape. She's supposed to be up here talking to this guy for this scene, but as it is she's yelling her lines really loud from the other side of the fort.
Robed Man: Miss Kayleigh... Welcome back! Come, come, you're just in time.
Kayleigh: "Just in time"? In time for what? Where is everyone? Is something happening? Let's scope out the place.


For Meredith's quest, the key to get into the music store with the album she wanted was in her pocket. Couldn't get in without her. Likewise, this is Kayleigh's quest, so this is the check to make sure she's present for the events inside.
Once she figures out how to leap over the fortress and glide over here, that is.


Music: The Mournchildren
Mourningtown is a town surrounded by a wooden wall, not a castle or anything. Inside is still open to the sky, with smaller structures here and there. Naturally the whole thing is set up as an environmental obstacle course, requiring me to poke into corners and find switches and raise bridges and fight cultists and all that sort of stuff.


I didn't intentionally go get the wall-climbing katamari before I did this quest, I went and got it to facilitate general exploration. But now that I have it, I can skip as much of Mourningtown as I want. This would've been handy in skipping the inside of Falldown Mall and getting straight to the record store for Meredith, too.


lmao get wrecked
This cultist had another tape, but Last Rites managed to KO her Thwackalope and knock her HP down to 0 with blowthrough, so she crumpled to the ground without a chance to transform into her second monster.

I'm fighting off all the cultists because I've got monsters to star up, but looking for switches and keys I couldn't care less about. The cultists are all going on about Leader Dorian and some kind of serpent god, as subtle as foreshadowing can get.


One of the shacks has another hint on how to get an alternate remaster line, this time out of Allseer.


I can't vineball out of the water -- hell, I'm pretty sure the game doesn't expect me to be able to swim yet, either -- so I do have to find the switch to raise these platforms so I can hop across.

[nosimpleway]

hey guys what's up in this thread


Okay, lot to unpack here.
Kayleigh: Who is she? Is she... my replacement? Creepy.
Jacqueline: Dorian will now speak!


When you're the cult leader you can decide to wear whatever you want, and that Dorian chose to wear that says more about his personality than his dialog ever could.
Dorian: HOW'S IT GOIN', EVERYBODY! Man, what a great crowd you always are!
Listen, guys, mournchildren or whatever, you've all been doing such a great job with digging. I mean seriously, this is a primo quality hole!

"Primo quality hole" was my nickname in college.

Dorian: This pit is as deep as your devotion to the cause. It's like a metaphor!
When I first heard the whispers in my head guiding me beneath the earth, I knew I couldn't do this alone. And sure, we've had ups and downs... But we've done it! Pull the curtain!


At the bottom of the pit, directly under where Dorian and Jacqueline are standing, the cult has excavated the entrance to the Mer-Line station hinted at by the Magikrab outside. You'd think all the cultists would already know it was there since they're the ones who dug it up, but Dorian is nothing if not a showman, I guess.

Dorian: Soon I will enter the chamber and bargain with him for a share of his divine power!
And to accompany me, our prodigal daughter returns to us! Isn't that right... Kayleigh?

While it's entered modern lexicon as "someone who leaves and comes back", the word "prodigal" actually means someone who's wastefully extravagant in their spending. But Dorian is presented as kind of a know-nothing know-it-all, so it's not out of character for him to use the wrong word sometimes just so he can sound more photosynthesis.

Kayleigh: Oh no.
Dorian: Kayleigh, honey, you look like a deer in the headlights! Of course I got word you were joining us for our brobdingnagian party!

I probably shouldn't have gone out of my way to beat up all the cultists on my way in.

Kayleigh: I'm sorry. I'll explain later. We need to put a stop to this for now.
Dorian: You didn't believe in me, did you? Well it looks like I was right all along, baby! There's a real damn Archangel right under our feet!
Kayleigh: We've fought Archangels, Dorian! If you go in there, you'll get yourself killed!
Dorian: If you and your friend have so much experience, why not come and join in the fun? C'mon, watch me ascend to godhood with my new Archangel buddy!
Jacqueline, the platform, if you please.
Jacqueline: As you wish, sir.


Jacqueline follows Dorian inside.
Kayleigh: I hate him so much. C'mon, let's go stop this idiot from whatever he thinks he's doing.


Music: The Stations Underneath
On the upside, I can see the tracks from here, so there's no puzzle or anything to get to Platform B.
Dorian: Kayleigh! Kayleigh's friend! You made it! I have made the tactical decision to amend the plan!
Jacqueline: Sir?
Dorian: Kayleigh and friend will go ahead first, and if they aren't instantly killed by the Archangel, then I'll go in and do my sweet-talking.
Kayleigh: You're a fool and you're going to get yourself killed.
Dorian: You first.

[nosimpleway]

Well... that's... certainly... something...

Kayleigh: Another Archangel... It's as painful to look at as the others...

HAVE YOU HEARD MY CALL?
ARE YOU HERE TO PAY TRIBUTE?
ARE YOU HERE TO BURN FOR ME?


Transition to battle screen, but only Dorian appears on the left side.
Dorian: O GREAT ARCHANGEL! I HAVE HEEDED YOUR CALL AND TRAVELLED TO YOUR ABODE! FOR MY LOYALTY, I ASK FOR A SHARE OF YOUR DIVINE STREN--


Dorian does get to finish his sentence, but the text box automatically closes for the Archangel's response.


For his trouble Dorian has been turned into a greasy smear on the tile floor.
Kayleigh: I told him this would happen! C'mon snalligator, let's stop this thing before it kills anyone else!


Music: Same Old Story
We've seen a more-or-less normal 3D model for Morgante, a stop-motion doll for Poppetox, and a graphic-novel style ink drawing for Nowhere Monarch. Mourningstar was deliberately designed to evoke the appearance of those weird-ass angel/monster conglomerates you'd get out of RPGs in the early era of 3D gaming.



Mourningstar is brobdingnagian on free damage. Preemptive Strike can only proc once, since Archangels can't swap tapes, but Revenge Strike comes up kind of a lot.


Archangels are immune to stat debuffs, but status effects are fine. So I can't drop Mourningstar's accuracy directly, but Unitarget has the same effect. It turns out Mourningstar knows Broadcast to give itself Multitarget, so bringing Unitarget along was a good idea anyway, to cancel that out.


Apple Tree is a plant-type wall. Hitting the tree, even with a ranged attack, causes the person who attacked it to pick and eat an apple. This either heals a very small amount of HP or procs Poison status. A serpent, a fruit tree, a name that puns on "morning star"... God help me I am not a smart man but there must be some kind of symbolism here.


Yeah, like that. Ramtasm got poisoned, Decibelle recovered HP.


"It puts up a wall" isn't much of a gimmick for an Archangel, but it is still putting up a wall. So that I can't hurt the boss behind it. While it builds up its AP.


Oh, lovely. A critical hit on an Angelic Attack.


Eh, it worked for Morgante! I bring in a Jormungold with Call for Help, but spoilers, this is all it accomplishes. It spends the rest of its turns buffing itself before it decides it's earned its pay and leaves.


Managing poison status and knocking down walls is not too difficult, so knocking Mourningstar out before its next Angelic Attack isn't too tough.

[nosimpleway]

Music: Morgante's Song

[nosimpleway]

???: BOY DO I HAVE A JOB OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU!


slurp

???: I REMEMBER YOU! AND I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FOUND YOURSELVES DOWN HERE.

Everything just seems to work out. As soon as we get to the platform, the Mer-Line pulls through with an Archangel. If we weren't here, they probably wouldn't show up. So if we weren't here, you wouldn't get to suck them into your face. You should be thanking us.


Everyone takes a moment before they remember the scorch mark on the floor is somebody they used to know.
Kayleigh: I'm sorry, but it's his own fault. We should get out of here. The air here tastes like death.


Music: Kayleigh's Theme (Heartfelt)
Jacqueline: The commune... will open its gates. We will try and find common ground with the rest of New Wirral. We only wanted guidance... We never...
Kayleigh: I know. The people of this community aren't bad people. You just have to be wary of those you put your faith into.


The two sharing dialog directly, and making the same face at each other, really serves to underscore how Jacqueline is Kayleigh's doppelganger. If any explanation is given apart from the implication that Dorian had a type, I don't remember what it is. Jacqueline leaves to go do whatever it is she's doing now.

Kayleigh: That was messed up...
Prompt: "Are you OK?" / "How are you feeling?"
Kayleigh: I'm... I'll be fine. I feel awful for helping Dorian for so long, but... I blame him more than I blame myself. I found the Mournchildren around the same time he did. I needed that sense of community and belonging. He and I became good friends, and I was something of an... assistant to him.

Judging from the look on your face either you two were fuckin' or you killed a guy he wanted out of his way. None of my business which.

Kayleigh: I don't know if things just slowly changed, or if things were never good, but Dorian's hold over the people of Mourningtown became something sinister. It became about him, his wants, his dreams and delusions. It was no longer the community I desperately wished it was...
People were hurt, and I helped smooth things over for him.
No... I wasn't his "asisstant" -- I was his fixer.

Oh, so you killed a guy.

Kayleigh: I felt for so long like I was doing good - helping to maintain a positive status quo, even if people would get hurt now and then. I'm not a good person, snalligator.
Prompt: "I don't believe that!" / "Yes you are."

Whomst among us has not done regrettable things on behalf of a person who never deserved the courtesy? A bad person would have justified any amount of sunk-cost, while you did your best to get away. Then you came back and resolved the situation. You're fine.

Kayleigh: Heh... I'm glad you believe that.
I hope they do better with him gone now. Lost people look for guidance, and that's what Dorian offered them.
Well, we're another Archangel down. And... I'm gonna help you find the rest!


Finishing the tutorial with Kayleigh gives her first heart, and her quest the second. All other partners only get the first heart for completing their quest. Past those narrative milestones, it's a matter of battling together and accruing experience points to level up the rest of the way.
The second level unlocks Fusion Power, like that Orbital Beam I saw on my way through Cherry Hills. Now I can do stuff like that to other monsters!
I can fusion power with Kayleigh no matter which two monsters we're in, but let's see. Looks like the Fusion Power between Ramtasm and Decibelle is "Cosmic Meteor", a ranged attack that hits all enemies with power 150 and gives Rambelle the Multitarget status.

Kayleigh: That triangle man appeared again.

Uh oh. Now that you mention it, it's some kind of being on par with the Archangels, recruiting them all for some doubtlessly nefarious purpose. And I'm just a person.
Last I heard, Triangle Man hates Person Man. They have a fight, Triangle wins. Triangle Man.

Kayleigh: What do you think he wants with the Archangels?
So, did you get another line to your mysterious vision song? What was it? "Venture there and head southbound, where your wayward paths shall meet"? It sounds like it's pointing in a direction, but it doesn't narrow it down too much.
Right! Let's crack on! Where are we off to next? Didn't you hear some rumours about somemthing happening on the Southern Isles? We could see what's happening there, if you want!

You know what? Yeah. Let's go follow up on some of these damn rumors clogging up my quest list.

[nosimpleway]

Part 7: It's For No One But Me To Say What Direction I Shall Turn Now


Music: Like Chimeras
But I'm still gonna fight every Rogue Fusion I see. It takes a lot of Fused Material to get stuff from Wilma.


Wait a second...


Waaaaait a second...


If the name of a Fusion isn't a portmanteau of two monster names, then it's two of the same thing. Two Pombombs should just be a fire-type, so...


Poison pupper! Bootlegs can be found in the wild, but are more likely to be a component part to a Rogue Fusion than appearing on their own.


I record it, obvs.

Okay. First off, back to Autumn Hills. I saw a guy napping near a switch earlier, and now I'm gonna pester him.


Music: Autumn Hill
Zedd: What's that...? Sleeping? No, not at all! I was, uh, meditating. I'm Zedd, by the way.

I saw your zeds from where you were sawing zeds, that's how I knew you were here.


Zedd: That said, it's getting real difficult to "meditate" around here, what with all these Bulletinos zooming around. Any chance you could sort that out for me?

This starts the quest "Scattershot", where the goal is to beat up five wild Bulletinos. Velocirifles don't count, I checked.


I assume this is the game nudging the player toward recording a Bulletino and getting the Bulletino Dash. I already did that, so while I look for Bulletinos to squish I record a Masquerattle instead.


#007 Masquerattle, the "giant masked snake"
"It is often presumed that Masquerattles use the face-like armour plates on their heads to lure in unsuspecting prey. This is a myth - the faces on their heads are actually very creepy, and couldn't possibly convince anyone to approach them."
I said Carnivipers are Zubats, and that makes Masquerattles Golbats. Stronger than the previous form, able to do actual combat damage, and retaining a moveset to make them obnoxious to fight. Masquerattles pick up Hypnotise and Pre-Emptive Strike as they star up.
The remaster: What is the appeal of the noble serpent? Is it their elegance? Or their ruthlessness? Or would it be better to allow one to harness the power of the winds, as that hint recommended?

[nosimpleway]

Music: Captain Encounter: Hostile
Back to business.

Captain Zedd: Thanks for that. Man, it shouldn't be this hard for a ranger captain to get a bit of shut-eye around here!
Kayleigh: Oh! I TOTALLY forgot you're a ranger captain!

Kayleigh I have a rumour on my quest list that says "Zedd is a ranger captain, go find where he's sleeping in Autumn Hills somewhere". How did you forget?

Captain Zedd: Uh, I guess you're here to take my ranger training challenge, right?
*yawn* Alright then. Let's hit the hay - I mean, hit the battlefield. Yeah.

Hey, guess what Zedd's gimmick is.


Music: Face Down
Zedd's Stardigrade goes to sleep with either Meditate (for stat boosts) or Hibernate (for HP regen). But you can't sleep your way through a fight, all your attacks have only 1% accuracy!
Then his assistant in the form of Salamagus uses Sure-Fire, so that whatever move Stardigrade does next can't miss.
So my opponent is incredibly tanky and either getting tankier or restoring its own HP passively every turn, and is slamming me with power 120 astral moves. That's how it is.


Stardigrade opens with Magnet, so I can't target Salamagus directly to get it to stop, but I've got Decibelle with no shortage of team-hitting air moves. Once Salamagus is gone, and no more Sure-Fire, then Stardigrade almost can't hurt me anymore.
Next step: hit it with some metal. Metal drives astral-types Berserk, so it can only use attacking moves. Once Zedd wakes up, he won't be able to use Hibernate or Meditate again.


Zedd has a second tape, but it follows the same general strategy as the first: nap. But the Berserk status I layered onto Stardigrade doesn't clear, so Galagor can't go to sleep either. His gimmick overcome, it's just a matter of time before I wear through Galagor's defenses for the second KO.


Yep.


Heading south, I interrupt myself to fight a Fusion Swarm. It's a bunch of Carnivipers, nothing to report about it.


Music: By the Campfire
Having finished Kayleigh's quest, she's going to go back to being talkative while I rest and recover again.
Kayleigh: So, I've been having a bit of a think recently. I've spent some time processing my feelings over my time in Mourningtown. So much of my time was spent trying to keep people happy... In fact, I spent a LOT of time trying to please people. I think maybe I still do.

You do tend to apologize for things that aren't your fault.

Kayleigh: That's all well and good, but maybe it's good for me to think of what I like to do, as well. Otherwise I'll just burn myself out. There'll be nothing of me left.
Prompt: "Well, what things do you like to do in your own time?" / "What hobbies would you like to take up?"
Kayleigh: I... will have to think about that! I feel like when I was younger, I used to have so much more passion for things than I do as an adult. Is that normal? I have no idea.

Buddy pal I have severe anhedonia, don't ask me.

Kayleigh: Did you know I used to play guitar? Same as my dad. My earliest memories are of me, sitting on his lap, listening to him play.
Prompt: "How did he fit both you and a guitar on his lap at the same time?"
Kayleigh: ...Very carefully.
I bought my own guitar in my teens, but was never particularly good at it. I guess I gave it up, because I guess I felt like any hobby I had should probably amount to something eventually. And, well, if I wasn't destined to become a professional musician, what was the point of doing it at all?

Ah. Hustle culture rears its ugly head.

Prompt: "That's a shame!" / "That's not the right attitude!"
Kayleigh: You know what, you're right. It IS a shame that I gave it up. I should do more "me" stuff! A-and, I don't even have to do productive stuff! Maybe, if I want to sit in bed all day and read awful romance novels, I should do that too!
Prompt: "That's the spirit!" / "You're right! / "So, should I go get Meredith, or..."
Kayleigh: Thanks a million, snalligator. It feels good to get this off my chest. After all, we've been fusing into a great brobdingnagian monster together, haven't we?

That was one time.

Kayleigh: That's something of a bonding experience, if anything!
I'm pretty much finished with my cup of tea. What do you say, shall we get back to it, then?


That didn't take long.

[nosimpleway]

Music: Captain Encounter: Hostile
???: I heard you coming from at least 200 meters out. If you wanted the element of surprise, you've lost it.
Prompt: "Uhh... OK." / "Who are you...?" / "If I wanted the element of surprise I wouldn't have talked to you first, ya dingus."
Captain Judas: Judas Knight. Ranger captain, survivalist expert. My job is to stay alive, no matter what. That's easier said than done when you have to do your "surviving" on an island crawling with vicious predators. We're a long way from home, and the only thing that separates us from the beasts is our ability to strategise.

I thought it was infrastructure.

Captain Judas: When you're staring a monster dead in the eyes, the only way you're coming out alive is if you know the battle is already won. Do you want a first-hand lesson in survival, then? I've already received intel that you're a ranger trainee.


lmao
It'd be hilarious for Judas to go on and on about survival over all and I wipe his partner out with a preemptive strike, but Dandylion is a little too tanky for the OHKO.


Particularly because Judas's gimmick is a reliance on damage over time, health regen, and counterattacks. Dandylion sets up Doc Leaf to get a little health regen, but it's not enough to keep standing after one more hit.


Manispear follows quickly enough that it can't set up any of its status buffs. Wonderful 7 managed to poison it, even, which would counteract Doc Leaf even if he used it.


The second half of Judas's strategy is to use a Jellyton to proc Poison kickers on all its melee attacks, but hitting a metal type with a poison move just covers the sharp points with venom, giving it its own contact damage.


Okay, Jellydas has half his hit points left but this battle is over.
Captain Judas: You had strategies... to counteract my strategies. You have the mindset of a true ranger. You've earned this.


Boom.


Music: By the Campfire
Kayleigh: I wonder what life is like for the citizens of Harbourtown who were born here. I mean, this whole world is all they've ever known. And yet... people like us keep describing whole worlds of people and places. They probably find it hard to comprehend what we're talking about!

"Why, just the other day I was talking about how I had to sell 'feet pics' to pay off my 'student loans' and the guy I was talking to had no idea what either of those things were!"

Kayleigh: But then on the other hand, they're much more used to the everpresent monster population. I guess it is very much a town of two halves.

Then I go fight a Nevermort fusion swarm. Second Velocirifle stars up to five on it, so I've got that going for me, which is nice. Since it's time to go rest again:

Kayleigh: I think... if I do get to go back home, I'll need to put all my ranger skills into action. It would be a waste of everything I've learned here to go back to how I was living before.
Prompt: "What was your life like before?" / "What did you do before you ended up here?"
Kayleigh: Uhh... I wasn't living what you'd call an exciting life. I dropped out of college and worked in a shop in my hometown. It was pleasant, but after everything I've been through on this island? I'm not sure that would satisfy me anymore.

On the upside I'm pretty sure that many real-world problems could also be solved by finding the right people, transforming into a gigantic monster, and stomping on them. That's a transferable skill, that is.

Anyway. Velocirifle hit five stars, and this one had the Gear Shear sticker equipped, so it transforms into not-Artillerex.


#044 Gearyu, the "Metal Gear Lizard"
"The Gearyu's body is centered around several enormous gears that are held together with a magnetic force. It spins its gears to generate kinetic energy which it can emit from its mouth as powerful elemental breath attacks."
The final monster to remaster from Bulletino, Gearyu has completely forgotten where it came from. Its speed is middling, and it's no longer able to learn moves exclusive to speedy or agile monsters like Quick Smack or Icicle Dart. But man, that Ranged Attack... and as Leader Ianthe showed in her character introduction, Radiation Breath is no joke.
The inspiration: Mechagodzilla is called "Kiryu" sometimes.

[nosimpleway]

Captain Zedd was in Autumn Hills, on the far eastern side of the map. Captain Judas was on an island in the southeast corner. Next stop: New London, just south of Autumn Hills. I'm gonna clear out all the captains on this side of the map.


Music: Captain Encounter: Hostile
Something about Penny Dreadful's design just screams "Kickstarter backer character insert" but Cassette Beasts wasn't funded on Kickstarter.

Captain Penny Dreadful: They called this place "New London" once. Harbourtown had a lot of residents and was ready to establish a shiny new settlement. I grew up here, y'know? Spent me whole childhood here, hearin' stories of the real London town. Sounds like an 'orrible place! Cutthroats, highwaymen, vampires... I was bloody fascinated with it!


Given the wink that accompanies the line about vampires I'm not sure how seriously I should take anything she's telling me.

Prompt: "Sounds fun!" / "I don't know if those were all true stories..."
Captain Penny Dreadful: Of course, when the town burned down, all those stories were lost. Everyone and everything here went up in flames too, except little ol' me. Penny Dreadful, ranger captain, cheater of death, here in the flesh!

Can you guess what Penny's fight gimmick is gonna be yet

Prompt: "Cheater of death...?" / "That's an odd nickname."
Captain Penny Dreadful: The blighters in Harbourtown have a lot of different beliefs, but all agree on one thing - we're all gonna kick the bucket eventually. I think they simply lack imagination. Death isn't the end... not if you know the esoteric ways. I could give you a demonstration, if you think you're ready for it. You're the latest ranger trainee, right? You lookin' for a scrap to prove your worth?


Music: Face Down
Mmhmm.
Penny Dreadful's gimmick is avoiding damage by use of Haunt. The assisting Sanzatime does its best to keep Haunt going by means of Dog Years, but if it looks like it might run out, Penny Dreadful's Skelevangelist also has Ritual to auto-revive itself once it's knocked out.


But I knew how to deal with the ghosts in Falldown Mall and I know how to deal with ghosts now.


Yes by all means please continue to waste turns on using Haunt.


I don't even care that The Old 1-2 is giving Penny Dreadful's Djinn Entonic an AP boost, it's got like three HP left.


Music: Captain Encounter (Peaceful)
Captain Penny Dreadful: I'm bloody impressed. Even shifting myself from this mortal plane wasn't enough to stop you from comin' out on top. Here's your reward for defeating the immortal Penny Dreadful!


Captain Penny Dreadful: Remember, trainee - if life is what you make of it, then death is too!
I'm not quite sure what it means, but it sounds profound!

[nosimpleway]

I don't remember what this was but it couldn't have been important or interesting, I didn't take a single screen capture of the fight.


Music: By the Campfire
Kayleigh: I do wonder how the whole "cassette tape monster transforming" thing works.



Kayleigh: It doesn't make sense on the surface right? I mean, these are just normal cassette players. They're made of plastic. But maybe I have the wrong attitude. Maybe focusing too much on the limitations is the wrong way to think about it. Maybe by accepting that the impossible can still happen, we eneable it to happen, y'know?


Music: Captain Encounter: Hostile
Captain Skip is hanging out just southwest of Harbourtown. It's close, but it takes the Bulletino Dash to get to the west side of Harbourtown and then Swim is needed to get out to his little island.

Captain Skip: Boy, the offworlders really make a lot of stuff, don't they? Greetings! I'm Skip, one of the ranger captains of New Wirral. I gather and sort all the stuff you offworlders make that ends up here. Electronics, furniture, you name it! It all gets washed up here and put to good use! One world's trash is another world's treasure, after all!
Say, are you the new ranger trainee? The one who's got a knack for fighting? I suppose I could take a break from my dumpster diving if you want to take on my challenge!

Hmm, he didn't completely tip his hand on what his gimmick is. What could it be?
Music: Face Down


...Oh.


Skip and his assistant both set up with Binvitation and Metal Wall, then fire off Binvasion for as many hits as they can muster.


But Binvasion is only power 30... it takes a lot of hits to do any substantial amount of damage.


Skip's second monster is a Binterloper, which still counts as a Binvader for the purposes of Metal Wall and Binvasion. It's plastic-type instead of metal-type, but that means it still doesn't get a same-type attack bonus off of the fire-type Binvasion.


This is the first fight where I've knocked out the ranger captain before their assistant. No brobdingnagian deal, with either of them KOed that's one less Binvader that can put up a Metal Wall, so fewer hits from Binvasion.


And Kayleigh has a move that can instantly break walls. The best this guy can do is to get another assist in with Binvitation... to hit twice.


I wasn't impressed with Binvader's gimmick when I described it back in Falldown Mall, and I'm not any more impressed having seen it in action.


Rangers have more interesting battles than "all of my mons are of this type" that you get from gym leaders in Pokemon (and certainly more than "look at all these fucking HP I have" from bosses in Palworld), but they're still pretty easy once you figure out your way around those gimmicks. Or are Skip.

[nosimpleway]

Wherever I Am Now:
Main Quests:
Land of Confusion: Locate Archangels to complete Morgante's song, then follow the clues it contains to find your way home. Collected 3/8 song parts.
Take Me On: Train with each of the ranger captains to become a ranger. Trained with 5/12 captains.
Acting On Your Best Behavior: Meet up with Eugene in the Outskirts.
Everybody's Looking for Something: Find Viola's brother Sebastian.

Side-Quests:
Coin-Operated: A coin-operated andriod in Eastham Woods appears to be malfunctioning. Perhaps finding a suitable coin will help restore it to life.

Rumors:
Eugene: "I saw Eugene hanging out near a strange building outside of town. What is he doing out there?"
Captain Lodestein: "Have you been to Ham before? You know, the little valley west of Eastham Woods where Captain Lodestein hangs out?"
Metal Woman: "I heard there's a metal woman up in Eastham Woods. Have you met her?"
Captain Buffy: "Captain Buffy's my favorite. She works out in Cherry Meadow, don't you know?"
Tiny Dominoth: "You probably won't believe me, but I saw a tiny little Dominoth in the clearing in the center of Cherry Meadow. It wasn't just a baby, it was small enough to fit in my hand! How do you think it got like that? Something strange is going on over there..."
Ruin: "Supposedly there's an old ruin that appeared in the Cherry Meadow recently. Sounds pretty strange, doesn't it?"
Captain Cybil: "My favorite radio show is Cybil FM, hosted by Captain Cybil herself, out in the marshes!"
Lost Dog: "Hey, do you know anyone who's lost a dog? I saw one running around with a tape recorder - just an ordinary dog, not a Pombomb! - at the foot of Mt. Wirral, near the corner of the lake. I do hope the poor thing is OK..."
Captain Heather: "Someone I know who scavenges wrecks in the Cast Iron Shore told me he saw Captain Heather on an island way off in the west..."


Type Interactions Thus Far:
Air: Uproots grass (AP Drain), Extinguishes fire (Melee/Ranged attack down), Energizes astral (AP Boost)
Astral: Drains fire, water, earth, air (AP Drain), Energizes astral (AP Boost)
Earth: Energizes astral (AP Boost), Extinguishes fire (Melee/Ranged attack down)
Fire: Updrafts air (free wall), Energizes astral (AP Boost), Melts ice (Water coating), Melts plastic (poison coating), Ignites poison and plant (Burn), Steams water (HP regen)
Ice: Chills air (Accuracy down), Conducts lightning (Multitarget)
Lightning: Electrifies ice and water (Conductive, extra lightning damage whenever a lightning move is used), Insulates plastic (electric-type contact damage)
Metal: Disturbs astral (Berserk)
Plant: Seeds earth (Leeched)
Plastic: Distracts astral (AP Drain), Smokes fire (Evasion Up), Insulates lightning (Unitarget)
Poison: Disturbs astral (Berserk), Coats earth and metal (Contact damage)
Water: Conducts lightning (Multitarget)